英语笑话听力+文本：Beer for washing hair 啤酒是洗头用的

Beer for washing hair 啤酒是洗头用的 Two nuns were shopping and happened to be passing the beer store. One asks the other if she would like a beer. The other nun answered that would be good, but that she would be queasy about purchasing it. Th

英语笑话听力+文本：Bargain讨价还价

[00:24.82]used-car 二手车 [00:28.53]in great condition 情况不错 [00:32.47]feign 假装 [00:37.10]英文原文 [00:38.01]My son, a used-car dealer, [00:39.77]showed his customer a 2005 Chevy in great condition. [00:43.20]And it's only $7, 000,

英语笑话听力+文本：Arrange the lunar eclipse安排月蚀

[00:41.52]A listener called the disc jockey on the air at our radio station [00:44.83]to ask about the upcoming lunar eclipse. [00:47.66]The eclipse can be seen at 1:30 in the morning, the DJ told her. [00:51.28]That late? the listener snapped. [00:5

英语笑话听力+文本：Wrong Way错误方向

Wrong Way 错误方向 As an old man was driving down the freeway, his car phone rang. Answering, he heard his wife's voice urgently warning him, Fred, I just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong way on Interstate 94. Please be carefu

英语笑话听力+文本：Are you a normal person你是正常人吗

Are you a normal person？ 你是正常人吗？ During a visit to the mental asylum, a visitor asked the director ..., What is the criterion that defines a patient to be institutionalized? Well... said the director, we fill up a bathtub, and we offe

英语笑话听力+文本：Leave the color把颜色留下

[00:24.73]local 当地的 [00:27.77]one-time fee 一次性付费 [00:32.14]disconnecting 中断 [00:36.11]object to 反对 [00:39.69]calmly 平静地 [00:43.22]英文原文 [00:44.72]Years ago, people rented phones from the local telephone company [0

英语笑话听力+文本：A dog can play the piano会弹钢琴的狗

A dog can play the piano 会弹钢琴的狗 A guy walks into a bar with a small dog. The bartender says, Get out of here with that dog! The guy says, But this isn't just any dog... this dog can play the piano! The bartender replies, Well, if he can p

英语笑话听力+文本：Keep driving my truck继续开我的卡车

[00:24.95]under his belt 带着（经验） [00:29.30]dash 打碎 [00:33.29]sympathize 同情 [00:36.63]英文原文 [00:38.21]With several years of Army National Guard duty under his belt, [00:42.02]my roommate applied for officer training. [00:44.2

英语笑话听力+文本：Truly American scholar果然是美国学者

Truly American scholar 果然是美国学者 [00:07.29]Listen and Share [00:11.44]Truly American scholar 果然是美国学者 [00:24.64]词汇扫描 [00:28.46]involve 与有关 [00:31.85]history archive 历史档案馆 [00:36.26]station 驻扎 [00:3

英语笑话听力+文本：Scroll down往下滚轮

Scroll down 往下滚轮 My husband and I are both in an Internet business, but he's the one who truly lives, eats and breathes computers. I finally realized how bad it had gotten when I was scratching his back one day. No, not there, he directed. Sc

英语笑话听力+文本：In the middle of nowhere这到底是哪？

[00:25.23]divert 攺道 [00:28.12]approach 接近 [00:31.13]be familiar with 熟悉 [00:35.09]英文原文 [00:36.92]Stormy weather diverted our Dallas-bound flight to another airport. [00:40.53]As we approached the runway, the pilot came on the inte

英语笑话听力+文本：What's up babe?宝贝,最近怎么样了?

[00:25.03]sushi bar 寿司店 [00:28.57]accent 口音 [00:31.94]patron 顾客 [00:34.97]observe 注意到 [00:38.22]wasabi 芥辣 [00:42.20]英文原文 [00:43.50]Working as a server at a sushi bar, [00:46.26]I saw a customer trying to get my attenti

英语笑话听力+文本：Want to be a teacher想当老师

[00:25.04]senior 高三学生 [00:28.56]babble 不停地说 [00:31.78]life's calling 人生目标 [00:35.82]misspell 拼写错误 [00:39.68]英文原文 [00:41.13]When I was a high school senior, [00:42.66]I saw an inspirational ad on TV about becomi

英语笑话听力+文本：Modern chivalry现代骑士精神

[00:23.83]fare 费用 [00:26.35]downpour 暴雨 [00:29.86]puddle 水洼 [00:33.13]destination 目的地 [00:36.67]chivalry 骑士精神 [00:40.38]英文原文 [00:42.74]Sitting in his cab waiting for a fare, my friend's husband, William, [00:46.78]wa

英语笑话听力+文本：Quotes in the movie电影里的引语

Quotes in the movie 电影里的引语 A friend and I went to a screening of the movie hamlet at Southern Illinois University in Carbondale. I was struck by the beauty of the language, thinking how even today Shakespeare's writing remains powerful an

英语笑话听力+文本：A dumb boy笨小孩

A dumb boy 笨小孩 A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer ..., This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you. The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then call

英语笑话听力+文本：Honesty诚实

[00:46.99]investment counselor 投资顾问 [00:51.43]go out on one's own 自谋生路，自立门户 [00:57.37]shrewd 精明的，明智的 [01:02.14]diligent 勤勉的，努力工作的 [01:06.90]in-house counsel 法律顾问 [01:11.12]integrity 诚实

英语笑话听力+文本：Height, Not Length是高度,不是长度

[00:39.12]height 高度 [00:43.33]length 长度 [00:47.42]mathematician 数学家 [00:52.35]be required to do something 被要求做某事 [00:58.34]measuring tape 卷尺 [01:04.45]A team of mathematicians were required [01:06.76]to measure the heigh

英语笑话听力+文本：Blonde Detectives美女侦探

Blonde Detectives 美女侦探 [00:13.26]Blonde Detectives [00:25.02]美女侦探 [00:33.00]词汇扫描 [00:37.19]interrogate 询问 [00:44.35]suspect 嫌疑犯 [00:50.11]profile 侧面 [00:56.11]fluster 惊惶失措 [01:02.75]flash 晃一下 [01:05

英语笑话听力+文本：Word of inspiration

Word of inspiration 圣灵的感悟 Jake had been an observant catholic and was in the hospital, near death. The family called their priest, to be with them. As the priest stood next to the bed, Jake's condition appeared to deteriorate rapidly and he