How to fuck up your entire day(or life)in 5 simple steps五个会让你虚度人生的简单步骤: Step1.Grab your dumb phone as soon as you wake up,before stretching and having a tall glass of water,and start looking at all the shit everyone else

发表于:2019-02-13 / 阅读(52) / 评论(0) 分类 英语美文

The significant inscription found on an old key---If I rest, I rust---would be an excellent motto for those who are afflicted with the slightest bit of idleness. Even the most industrious person might adopt it with advantage to serve as a reminder th

发表于:2019-02-13 / 阅读(43) / 评论(0) 分类 英语美文

As a recent college grad, I was starting to figure out this adult life thing I got a job, found a place to live and managed to balance a social life with these new 9-5 responsibilities. Things were going according to plan, until they weren't. I lost

发表于:2019-02-13 / 阅读(59) / 评论(0) 分类 英语美文

I like for you to be still 我喜欢你是静静的 I like for you to be still: it is as though you are absent and you hear me from far away and my voice does not touch you It seems as though your eyes had flown away and it seems that a kiss had seal

发表于:2019-02-13 / 阅读(41) / 评论(0) 分类 英语美文

ChopinThe Beautiful Soul of Music 钢琴诗人肖邦 Can Frederic Chopin, who wrote no symphonies, no operas, and no string quartets, who wrote only for the piano, be considered one of the greatest classical composers of all time? Instrument makers a

发表于:2019-02-13 / 阅读(42) / 评论(0) 分类 英语美文

Wife's Begging 妻子的祈求 Two men were talking at the break-room. 两位男士正在休息室淡论着。 One was telling the other about a fight he had had with his wife. 一位对另一位说起他与妻子的一场争斗。 In the end he said

发表于:2019-02-15 / 阅读(56) / 评论(0) 分类 经典双语笑话

Three Drunkards 三个醉汉 Two drunkards are walking along. 两个醉汉正在走着。 One says to the other, What a beautiful night, look at the moon. 其中一个对另一个说,多么美丽的夜晚呀,看那月亮。 The second drunkard st

发表于:2019-02-15 / 阅读(59) / 评论(0) 分类 经典双语笑话

Where It Should Be Plugged 插在何处 A mother is very good at using every chance to educate his son, who was only three years old. 一位母亲十分擅长利用每一个机会教育孩子。她的儿子中有3岁。 One day, she took a plug and s

发表于:2019-02-15 / 阅读(53) / 评论(0) 分类 经典双语笑话

Kid's Perspective 孩子的视角 On the way home from the first day of school, 在上学第一天回家的路上, the father asked his son, What did you do at school today? 父亲问儿子,你今天在学校做了什么? The little boy shrugge

发表于:2019-02-15 / 阅读(48) / 评论(0) 分类 经典双语笑话

Failure in a Test 考试不及格 Why did you get such a low mark on that test? 这次测试你为什么得这么低的分? Because of absence. 因为缺考。 You mean you were absent on the day of the test? 你的意思是考试那天你没去?

发表于:2019-02-15 / 阅读(53) / 评论(0) 分类 经典双语笑话

A Touching Farewell 一个感人的告别 Two old friends were out golfing. 两个老朋友出外打高尔夫球, As they were preparing to tee off near a road, 当他们在一处路旁准备开球时, a funeral cortege drove by and one of the tw

发表于:2019-02-15 / 阅读(73) / 评论(0) 分类 经典双语笑话

Wait till Next Year 等明年再说 The woman was reading the newspaper as she and her husband were eating breakfast. 一位女士和她先生正在用早餐,她边吃边看报纸。 Did you hear about this, dear? she asked. 亲爱的,你听过这则

发表于:2019-02-15 / 阅读(57) / 评论(0) 分类 经典双语笑话

A Half-price Ticket 半价票 How much is the movie ticket? 电影票多少钱一张? Ten dollars, kid. 10美元,孩子。 I only have five dollars. 我只有5美元。 Please let me in. 请让我进去吧, I'll see it only with one eye. 我只用

发表于:2019-02-15 / 阅读(46) / 评论(0) 分类 经典双语笑话

It's the Law 这是个法律问题 A slender, delicate, immaculately dressed Englishman was explaining to the visiting American about British law. 一位身材修长,举止文雅,穿着光鲜的英国人向来访的美国人解释英国法律。

发表于:2019-02-15 / 阅读(48) / 评论(0) 分类 经典双语笑话

And Modest Too 也要谦虚为怀 The man I marry must be as wise as Solomon, 我要结婚的对象必须要像所罗门王一样聪明, as mighty as Hercules, 像赫克力士一样强壮, as brave as Admiral Nelson, 像纳尔逊上将一样英勇,

发表于:2019-02-15 / 阅读(56) / 评论(0) 分类 经典双语笑话

Can't You Be Little More Supportive? 你能不能多支持我一点? The delighted young politician called his mother and reported enthusiastically, 一位年轻的政客打电话给他母亲,高兴地说道: Hey, Mom, I just won the election! 嘿,

发表于:2019-02-15 / 阅读(57) / 评论(0) 分类 经典双语笑话

All's Well That Ends Well 结局好的就是好 Three rather deaf friends met on a street corner. 三个重听很严重的朋友在街角碰面。 Windy today, isn't it? said the first. 今天风好大,不是吗?第一个说。 No, it's Thursday, s

发表于:2019-02-15 / 阅读(111) / 评论(0) 分类 经典双语笑话

Unit 6 Is This What They Mean by Second Childhood? 第六课 老年是人生的第二个童年期吗? An old man sees a little boy sitting on a curb, crying. 一位老人看见一个小男孩坐在路旁号啕大哭。 What's the matter, little boy?

发表于:2019-02-15 / 阅读(102) / 评论(0) 分类 经典双语笑话

A Remarkable Talent 一位了不起的天才 Did you know I could tell time by the piano? asked one friend of another. 你相信我可以由钢琴知道现在几点钟吗?一位老兄向他的朋友问道。 You're kidding, replied his companion dubi

发表于:2019-02-15 / 阅读(108) / 评论(0) 分类 经典双语笑话

最近,大家都说,物价上涨太快,有钱人都出国打酱油去了;比较有钱的也都上香港买盐了。可见,咱们国家的有钱人真正在国内消费的似乎并不多。要不,英国怎么会突然出现个货币词汇叫做

发表于:2019-02-18 / 阅读(48) / 评论(0) 分类 实用英语