The patient says, Doctor, I have a pain in my eye whenever I drink tea. The doctor says, Take the spoon out of the mug before you drink. mug = cup The patient says, Doctor, you've got to help me. Nobody ever listens to me. No one ever pays any attent

发表于:2018-12-03 / 阅读(75) / 评论(0) 分类 2011年ESL之就医和人际交往

Q: What has many keys but can't open any doors? A: A piano. Q: Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State Building? A: Yes, because the Empire State Building can't jump!

发表于:2018-12-03 / 阅读(64) / 评论(0) 分类 英语笑话(MP3+文本)

New Dad 初为人父 One day, shortly after the birth of their new baby, the mother had to go out to do some errands, so the proud father stayed home to watch his wonderful new son. Soon after the mother left, the baby started to cry. The father did eve

发表于:2018-12-06 / 阅读(97) / 评论(0) 分类 牙牙学英语

近日,一组科学家和心理学家尝试找出世界上最有趣的笑话。 The Funniest Jokes in the World by Chris Rose Recently, a group of scientists and psychologists decided to try and find out what the funniest joke in the world was. Thi

发表于:2018-12-07 / 阅读(145) / 评论(0) 分类 英语音频杂志

You will be pleased with me today, mother, said Dick to his mother, coming home from school. I saved on fares. I didn't go to school by bus, I ran all the way after it. Well, said his mother laughing, Next time you should run after a taxi, you will

发表于:2018-12-07 / 阅读(54) / 评论(0) 分类 英文笑话

God's joke Do you know what the cruel joke that God has played on all men is? He gave them a brain and a dick, but only enough blood to run one at a time. Notes: 1. Do you know what the cruel joke that God has played on all men is? 你知道上帝对所

发表于:2018-12-26 / 阅读(61) / 评论(0) 分类 英语笑话(MP3+文本)

relative A husband and wife were driving down the road arguing with each other. They passed a pig farm and the husband said, Are they relatives of yours? Yes, she replied, I married into the family. Notes: 1. A husband and wife were driving down th

发表于:2018-12-26 / 阅读(88) / 评论(0) 分类 英语笑话(MP3+文本)

Teacher: Can you tell me anything about the great scientists of the 18th century? Pupil: Yes, sir, I can. They are all dead. 教师:你能告诉我一些有关十八世纪的伟大科学家的事情吗? 学生:我能,先生。他们都死了。

发表于:2019-01-02 / 阅读(73) / 评论(0) 分类 英文笑话

Student: I don't think I deserve an absolute zero. Professor: Neither do I, but it is the lowest mark that I am allowed to give. 学生:我认为我不应该得零分。 教授:我也这么认为,但这是允许我打的最低分数。

发表于:2019-01-02 / 阅读(84) / 评论(0) 分类 英文笑话

Student A: If the Dean doesn't take back what he said to me this morning, I am going to leave college. Student B: What did he say? Student A: He told me to leave college. 学生甲:如果院长不收回他今天早上对我说的话,我就要离开学院。 学生乙:他说了什

发表于:2019-01-02 / 阅读(73) / 评论(0) 分类 英文笑话

First man: In my house I'm really somebody. Second man: Is that so? First man: Yes. Every night my wife calls out from the kitchen, Will somebody take out the garbage? 第一位男人:我在家里确实是一个人物。 第二位男人:真是这样吗? 第一位男人:是的,

发表于:2019-01-02 / 阅读(58) / 评论(0) 分类 英文笑话

English Jokes Selections (1) 一 Bill Clinton and his driver were cruising along a country road one night when all of a sudden they hit a pig, killing it instantly. Bill told his driver to go up to th

发表于:2019-01-03 / 阅读(78) / 评论(0) 分类 趣味英语

English Jokes Selections (2) 五 A man was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said:

发表于:2019-01-03 / 阅读(107) / 评论(0) 分类 趣味英语

看美国的性感论,常会遇到有趣的jokes 。这里就从此处取材,先从简单的以Bargain Counter(特价品专柜)为题的笑话说起。 He: Are you free tonight? She: No, but I'm inexpensive. 他问:你今晚有空吗?可是

发表于:2019-01-08 / 阅读(56) / 评论(0) 分类 英语阅读理解

Oh, I see 哦,我懂了 Mr. Beans had always wanted to travel to the African jungle to hunt, and, to his mind,the greatest prey was beyond doubt the mighty gorilla. 奔驰先生总想到非洲打猎,在他看来,壮硕的大猩猩无疑是最佳的

发表于:2019-01-22 / 阅读(65) / 评论(0) 分类 经典双语笑话

[00:42.18]frost 冰冻 [00:46.29]beverage 液体饮料 [00:49.71]brunch 早午餐 [00:53.93]blender 搅拌机 [01:00.89]SERVINGS 4-6 4-6人份 [01:04.91]CATEGORY Beverages 类别:饮料 [01:09.21]PREP 5 min. 准备:5分钟 [01:13.59]TOTAL 5 min. 共

发表于:2019-01-22 / 阅读(68) / 评论(0) 分类 英语笑话(MP3+文本)

[00:15.06]Just want to take a day off 想请一天假 [00:26.06]词汇扫描 [00:29.68]run [r?n] 经营 [00:32.90]time off 请假 [00:36.07]英文原文 [00:38.35]A big challenge of running a small business [00:41.29]is dealing with employees' reques

发表于:2019-02-15 / 阅读(66) / 评论(0) 分类 英语笑话(MP3+文本)

[00:13.73]Mental deficiency [00:16.10]智力缺陷 [00:19.02]Would you mind telling me, Doctor, [00:22.09]Bob asked... [00:23.67]how you detect a mental deficiency in somebody [00:28.05]who appears completely normal? [00:31.34]Nothing is easier, he r

发表于:2019-02-22 / 阅读(76) / 评论(0) 分类 英语笑话(MP3+文本)

[00:13.88]Beware of Dog! [00:16.14]小心有狗! [00:18.98]As a stranger entered a little country store, [00:23.11]he noticed a sign warning, [00:26.15]Danger! Beware of dog! [00:29.59]posted on the glass door. [00:32.12]Inside, he noticed a harmless

发表于:2019-02-22 / 阅读(84) / 评论(0) 分类 英语笑话(MP3+文本)

A guy is reading his paper [00:20.69]when his wife walks up behind him [00:23.18]and smacks him [00:23.99]on the back of the head [00:25.12]with a frying pan. [00:26.85]He asks, What was that for? [00:29.28]She says, [00:30.66]I found a piece of pape

发表于:2019-02-22 / 阅读(115) / 评论(0) 分类 英语笑话(MP3+文本)