Two Tickets Please

1. Two Tickets Please A young man was in love with a girl. At one weekend, he invited his girlfriend to the cinema. When they were at the ticket box, the young man said to the ticket seller, Two tickets, please. When the ticket seller told him that a

发表于:2019-02-18 / 阅读(53) / 评论(0) 分类 趣味英语

Saving Grace

Vacationing in Hawaii, my husband and I went out to dinner one night at one of its finest restaurants - When presented with the check, my husband reached into his pocket for his wallet, but somehow lost his balance and fell over. As the people at the

发表于:2019-02-18 / 阅读(71) / 评论(0) 分类 趣味英语

Opening a Bank Account

Daily Life - Opening a Bank Account (C0032) A: Next, please. May I help you, sir? B: Hello, yes, Id like to open a bank account. A: Certainly, I can can help you with that. What type of account would you like to open? A chequing or a savings account?

发表于:2019-02-18 / 阅读(107) / 评论(0) 分类 趣味英语

英文幽默笑话：The First Day as a Taxi Driver

A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the footpath, and stopped centimetres from a shop window. 乘客轻拍了一下出租车司机的肩膀

发表于:2019-02-18 / 阅读(70) / 评论(0) 分类 趣味英语

The Target

My cooking has always been the target of family jokes. One evening, as I prepared dinner a bit too quickly, the kitchen filled with smoke and the smoke detector went off. Although both of my children had received fire-safety training at school, they

发表于:2019-02-18 / 阅读(90) / 评论(0) 分类 趣味英语

The Gift

It was at the end of the school year, and a kindergarten teacher was receiving gifts from her pupils. The florist's son handed her a gift. She shook it, held it overhead, and said, I bet I know what it is. Some flowers. That's right the boy said, but

发表于:2019-02-18 / 阅读(87) / 评论(0) 分类 趣味英语

Shaving off his beard

A married man was visiting his girlfriend one day, when she requested that he shave his beard. Oh James, I like your beard, but I would really love to see your handsome face. James replied, My wife loves this beard, I couldn't possibly do it. She wou

发表于:2019-02-18 / 阅读(101) / 评论(0) 分类 趣味英语

Which One to Call Back

After I took office as mayor of a small Kentucky city, an unfortunate incident precipitated some hateful phone calls to my home. One night while I was conducting a city-council meeting, my wife answered the phone. Is this the home of Bert May, the ma

发表于:2019-02-18 / 阅读(101) / 评论(0) 分类 趣味英语

为什么你总是单身?史上最糟男友条件你有吗?

单身狗们，不要黯然神伤啦！不如反省一下自己，最容易导致单身的原因你占几样？且看史上最糟男友现场为你演绎单身宝典！本故事纯属虚构，仅供参考，切勿模仿哦~ 话说，妹纸们遇到这么

发表于:2019-02-18 / 阅读(63) / 评论(0) 分类 趣味英语

The Man and the Apples

A man was going to the house of some rich person. As he went along the road, he saw a box of good apples at the side of the road. He said, I do not want to eat those apples; for the rich man will give me much food; he will give me very nice food to e

发表于:2019-02-18 / 阅读(71) / 评论(0) 分类 趣味英语

Quick Service

A man took a pair of shoes to a shoe repair shop and said to the shoemaker, I'd like you to repair these shoes for me, please.Certainly, sir, the shoemaker said. When will they be ready? the man asked. I'm a bit busy, but they'll be ready for you on

发表于:2019-02-18 / 阅读(67) / 评论(0) 分类 趣味英语

盘点《绯闻少女》经典台词

They say the early bird gets the worn. Inspiring motivation...if you're the bird. The worm, however, has no idea when her future will be plucked away by the next airborne attacker. 都说早起的鸟儿有虫吃。励志之极...如果你是只鸟的话

发表于:2019-02-18 / 阅读(74) / 评论(0) 分类 趣味英语

In the air

Matt and his wife lived in the country. Matt was very stingy and hated spending money. One day a fair came to the nearby town. Let's go to the fair, Matt, his wife said. We haven't been anywhere for a long time.Matt thought about this for a while. He

发表于:2019-02-18 / 阅读(139) / 评论(0) 分类 趣味英语

Icing the cupcakes

A young man was visiting his brother and sister-in-law for Christmas dinner and was surprised to find his young nephew, Timmy, helping them bake some cupcakes. After they were done, his sister-in-law allowed Timmy to put the icing（糕点上的糖衣，

发表于:2019-02-18 / 阅读(62) / 评论(0) 分类 趣味英语

The Wild Apple-Tree

A swarm of bees settled and built hive in the hollow trunk of a wild apple－tree．They soon filled it with the treasures of honey，andthe tree became so proud in consequence，that it despised all its neighbours．Hereupon a rose－bush thus addre

发表于:2019-02-18 / 阅读(68) / 评论(0) 分类 趣味英语

That's What They All Say

While sitting on the bleachers during my youngest son's baseball game, I overheard another mother talking about her three-year-old daughter, who was playing with a neighbor's boy. The little girl kept saying to the boy, Marry me. Marry me. The little

发表于:2019-02-18 / 阅读(65) / 评论(0) 分类 趣味英语

Chaude and Cold 热与冷

学英语要生动的学，看故事学英语，看着这幽默的英语小故事，必定会对提高你对学习英语的兴趣。 A patron in Montreal cafe turned on a tap in the washroom and got scalded. This is an outrage, he complained. The fau

发表于:2019-02-18 / 阅读(67) / 评论(0) 分类 趣味英语

Understanding men

Men, summed up: The nice men are ugly. The handsome men are not nice. The handsome and nice men are gay. The handsome, nice and heterosexual men are married. The men who are not so handsome, but are nice men,have no money. The men who are not so hand

发表于:2019-02-18 / 阅读(109) / 评论(0) 分类 趣味英语

Frenchmen...

Three guys, an Englishman, a Frenchman and an American are walking along the beach together one day. They come across a lantern and a genie pops out of it. I will give you each one wish, says the genie. The American says, I am a farmer, my dad was a

发表于:2019-02-18 / 阅读(75) / 评论(0) 分类 趣味英语

Who's better satisfied?

A person with six children or A person with $6 million? The person with six children of course. Why? Because the one with $6 million wants more.

发表于:2019-02-18 / 阅读(76) / 评论(0) 分类 趣味英语
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