英语听力 暮光之城•暮色 第224期:第十三章 自白(15)

 I finally was able to speak, though my voice was faint. "In the hospital?" 我终于可以说话了，虽然我的声音是那么的微弱。“在医院里？”

His eyes flashed up to mine. 他的眼睛飞快地转向我的眼睛。
"I was appalled 1. I couldn't believe I had put us in danger after all, put myself in your power—you of all people. “我心惊胆寒。我不敢相信自己居然把我们放到了如此危险的境地，把自己置于你的股掌之下——在所有人中，偏偏选中了你。
As if I needed another motive 2 to kill you." 就好像我需要另一个动机来杀了你一样。”
We both flinched 3 as that word slipped out. 当这话说出口的时候，我们都畏缩了一下。
"But it had the opposite effect," he continued quickly. “但这却起了反作用。”他紧接着继续说道。
"I fought with Rosalie, Emmett, and Jasper when they suggested that now was the time... “我跟罗莎莉，艾美特还有贾斯帕大吵一架，因为他们提议现在正是时候……
the worst fight we've ever had. Carlisle sided with me, and Alice." 那是我们争辩得最激烈的一次。但卡莱尔站在我这边，还有爱丽丝。”
He grimaced 4 when he said her name. I couldn't imagine why. 当他说到她的名字时，他做了个鬼脸。我想不出为什么。
"Esme told me to do whatever I had to in order to stay." “艾思梅告诉我，我可以做任何我想做的事，只要我肯留下来。”
He shook his head indulgently. 他宠溺地摇了摇头。
"All that next day I eavesdropped 5 on the minds of everyone you spoke 6 to, shocked that you kept your word. “第二天，我一直在偷听所有和你说话的人的想法。我很震惊，你居然遵守了诺言。
I didn't understand you at all. But I knew that I couldn't become more involved with you. 我根本无法理解你。但我知道我不能和你再有任何牵连了。
I did my very best to stay as far from you as possible. 我竭尽全力，尽可能地远离你。
And every day the perfume of your skin, your breath, your hair... it hit me as hard as the very first day." 可每一天你的肌肤上散发出来的香气，你的呼吸，你的头发……这一切都像第一天那样深深地撼动着我。”
He met my eyes again, and they were surprisingly tender. 他又一次对上了我的眼睛，他的眼神温柔得惊人。
"And for all that," he continued, “而在经历了这一切之后，”他继续说道。
"I'd have fared better if I had exposed us all at that first moment, than if now, here— “我确实有所改进。虽然最初我暴露了我们所有人的真面目，虽然此时，此地——
with no witnesses and nothing to stop me—I were to hurt you." 没有目击者，也没有什么能阻止我——我还是有可能伤害你。”
I was human enough to have to ask. "Why?" 我的人类本能让我不得不问道：“为什么？”
"Isabella." “伊莎贝拉。”
He pronounced my full name carefully, then playfully ruffled 7 my hair with his free hand. 他仔细地拼读出我的全名，然后开玩笑地用他空着的手弄乱了我的头发。
A shock ran through my body at his casual touch. 他不经意的触碰让一阵震撼传遍了我的全身。
"Bella, I couldn't live with myself if I ever hurt you. “贝拉，如果我伤害了你，我绝对不会让自己活下去。
You don't know how it's tortured me." 你不知道这将会怎样地折磨着我。”
He looked down, ashamed again. 他垂下头，再次羞愧起来。
"The thought of you, still, white, cold... “只要想到你将变得僵硬，苍白，冰冷……
to never see you blush scarlet 8 again, to never see that flash of intuition in your eyes when you see through my pretenses 9... 再也看不到你羞怯的红晕，再也看不到当你看穿我的伪装时眼里一闪而过的直觉……
it would be unendurable." 这一切简直让人无法忍受。”
He lifted his glorious, agonized 10 eyes to mine. 他抬起那双明亮的，充满歉意的眼睛，看着我的眼眸。
"You are the most important thing to me now. “现在你是这个世界上对我来说最重要的事情了。
The most important thing to me ever." 至少对我来说是最重要的。”