【荆棘鸟】第九章 03

the irony 1 of it was thatthe rain had brought a dank chill into the air, and once more abright fire burned in the marble hearth 2.“What do you think, Bob?” Jack 3 asked.“I think it’s high time we went looking for him. He might be hurt,or he might be on foot and facing a long walk home. His horsemight have panicked and thrown him, he might be lying somewhereunable to walk. He had food for overnight, but nothing like enoughfor four days, though he won’t have passed out from starvationyet. Best not to create a fuss just now, so I won’t recall the menfrom Narrengang. But if we don’t find him by nightfall I’ll ride toDominic’s and we’ll get the whole district out tomorrow. Lord, Iwish those PMG blokes would get a move on with those phonelines!”Fee was trembling, her eyes feverish 5, almost savage 6.  “I’ll put on a pair of trousers,” she said. “I can’t bear to sit herewaiting.”“Mum, stay home!” Bob pleaded.“If he’s hurt it might be anywhere, Bob, and he might be in anysort of condition. You sent the stockmen to Narrengang, and thatleaves us mighty 7 short for a search party. If I go paired with Meggiethe two of us will be strong enough together to cope with whateverwe find, but if Meggie goes on her own she’ll have to search withone of you, and that’s wasting her, not to mentione me.”Bob gave in. “All right, then. You can have Meggie’s gelding;you rode it to the fire. Everyone take a rifle, and plenty of shells.” 
 
They rode off across the creek 8 and into the heart of that blastedlandscape. Not a green or a brown thing was left anywhere, just avast expanse of soggy black coals, incredibly still steaming afterhours of rain. Every leaf of every tree was frizzled to a curling limpstring, and where the grass had been they could see little blackbundles here and there, sheep caught in the fire, or an occasionalbigger mound 9 which had been a steer 10 or a pig. Their tears mingledwith the rain on their faces.Bob and Meggie headed the little procession, Jack and Hughiein the middle, Fee and Stuart bringing up the rear. For Fee andStuart it was a peaceful progress; they drew comfort from beingclose together, not talking, each content in the company of theother. Sometimes the horses drew close or shied apart at the sightof some new horror, but it seemed not to affect the last pair ofriders. The mud made the going slow and hard, but the charred,matted grass lay like a coir-rope rug on the soil to give the horsesa foothold. And every few yards they expected to see Paddy appearover the far flat horizon, but time went on and he never did.With sinking hearts they realized the fire had begun farther outthan first imagined, in Wilga paddock. The storm clouds must havedisguised the smoke until the fire had gone quite a long way. Theborderland was astonishing. One side of a clearly drawn 11 line was just black,glistening tar 4, while the other side was the land as they had alwaysknown it, fawn 12 and blue and drear in the rain, but alive. Bobstopped and drew back to talk to everyone.“Well, here’s where we start. I’m going due west from here; it’sthe most likely direction and I’m the strongest. Has everyone gotplenty of ammunition 13? Good. If you find anything, three shots inthe air, and those who hear must answer with one shot each. Thenwait. Whoever fired the three shots will fire three more five minuteslater, and keep on firing three shots every five minutes. Those whohear, one shot in answer.“Jack, you go south along the fire line. Hughie, you go southwest.I’m going west. Mum and Meggie, you go northwest. 
 
Stu, followthe fire line due north. And go slowly, everyone, please. The raindoesn’t make it any easier to see far, and there’s a lot of timber outhere in places. Call often; he might not see you where he wouldhear you. But remember, no shots unless you find something, becausehe didn’t have a gun with him and if he should hear a shotand be out of voice range to answer, it would be dreadful for him.“Good luck, and God bless.”Like pilgrims at the final crossroads they straggled apart in thesteady grey rain, getting farther and farther away from each other,smaller and smaller, until each disappeared along the appointedpath.Stuart had gone a bare half mile when he noticed that a standof burned timber drew very close to the fire’s demarcation line.There was a little wilga as black and crinkled as a pickaninny’smop, and the remains 16 of a great stump 17 standing 18 close to the charredboundary. What he saw was Paddy’s horse, sprawled 19 and fusedinto the trunk of a big gum, and two of Paddy’s dogs, little blackstiff things with all four limbs poking 20 up like sticks. He got downfrom his horse, boots sinking ankle deep in mud, and took his riflefrom its saddle scabbard. His lips moved, praying, as he picked hisslippery way across the sticky coals. Had it not been for the horse and thedogs he might have hoped for a swaggie or some down-and-outwayfarer caught, trapped. But Paddy was horsed and had five dogswith him; no one on the track rode a horse or had more than onedog. This was too far inside Drogheda land to think of drovers, orstockmen from Bugela to the west. Farther away were three moreincinerated dogs; five altogether, five dogs. He knew he would notfind a sixth, nor did he.And not far from the horse, hidden as he approached by a log,was what had been a man. There could be no mistake. Glisteningand shiny in the rain, the black thing lay on its back, and its backwas arched like a great bow so that it bent 21 upward in the middleand did not touch the ground except at the buttocks and shoulders.The arms were flung apart and curved at the elbows as if beseechingheaven, the fingers with the flesh dropping off them to revealcharred bones were clawing and grasping at nothing. The legs weresplayed apart also but flexed 22 at the knees, and the blob of a headlooked up sightless, eyeless at the sky. 
 
For a moment Stuart’s clear, all-seeing gaze rested on his father,and saw not the ruined shell but the man, as he had been in life.He pointed 15 his rifle at the sky, fired a shot, reloaded, fired a secondshot, reloaded, let off the third. Faintly in the distance he heardone answering report, then, farther off and very faintly, a secondanswer. It was then he remembered the closer shot would havecome from his mother and sister. They were northwest, he wasnorth. Without waiting the stipulated 23 five minutes, he put anothershell in the rifle breech, pointed the gun due south, and fired. Apause to reload, the second shot, reload, the third shot. He put theweapon back on the ground and stood looking south, his headcocked, listening. This time the first answer was from the west,Bob’s shot, the second from Jack or Hughie, and the third from hismother. He sighed in relief; he didn’t want the women reachinghim first.Thus he didn’t see the great wild pig emerge from the trees tothe north; he smelled it. As big as a cow, its massive bulk rolledand quivered on short, powerful legs as it drove its head down,raking at the burned wet ground. The shots had disturbed it, andit was in pain. The sparse 24 black hair on one side of its body wassinged off and the skin was redly raw; what Stuart smelled as hestared into the south was the delectable 25 odor of bubbled pork skin,just as it is on a roasted joint 26 fresh from the oven and crisp all overthe slashed 27 outer husk. Surprised out of the curiously 28 peacefulsorrow he always seemed to have known, his head turned, even ashe thought to himself that he must have been here before, that thissodden black place had been etched into some part of his brain onthe day of his birth:Stooping, he groped for the rifle, remembering it wasn’t loaded.The boar stood perfectly 29 still, its little reddened eyes mad with pain,the great yellow tusks 30 sharp and curving upward in a half circle.Stuart’s horse neighed, smelling the beast; the pig’s massive headswung to watch it, then lowered for the charge. While its attentionwas on the horse Stuart saw his only chance, bent quickly for therifle and snapped the breech open, his other hand in his jacketpocket for a shell. All around the rain was dropping down, mufflingother sounds in its own unchanging patter. But the pig heard thebolt slide back, and at the last moment changed the direction of itscharge from the horse to Stuart. It was almost upon him when hegot one shot off straight into the beast’s chest, without slowing itdown. The tusks slewed 31 up and sideways, and caught him in thegroin. He fell, blood appearing like a faucet 32 turned all the way onand saturating 33 his clothes, spurting 34 over the ground.Turning awkwardly as it began to feel the bullet, the pig cameback to gore 35 him again, faltered 36, swayed, and tottered 37. The wholeof that fifteen-hundred-pound bulk came down across him, andcrushed his face into the tarry mud. For a moment his hands clawedat the  ground on either side in a frantic 38, futile 39 struggle to be free; this thenwas what he had always known, why he had never hoped ordreamed or planned, only sat and drunk of the living world sodeeply there had not been time to grieve for his waiting fate. Hethought: Mum, Mum! I can’t stay with you, Mum!, even as hisheart burst within him.“I wonder why Stu hasn’t fired again?” 
 
Meggie asked her motheras they trotted 40 toward the sound of those two first triple volleys,not able to go any faster in the mud, and desperately 41 anxious.“I suppose he decided 42 we’d heard,” Fee said. But in the back ofher mind she was remembering Stuart’s face as they parted in differentdirections on the search, the way his hand had gone out toclasp hers, the way he had smiled at her. “We can’t be far awaynow,” she said, and pushed her mount into a clumsy, sliding canter.But Jack had got there first, so had Bob, and they headed thewomen off as they came across the last of the living land towardthe place where the bushfire had begun.“Don’t go in, Mum,” said Bob as she dismounted.Jack had gone to Meggie, and held her arms.The two pairs of grey eyes turned, not so much in bewildermentor dread 14 as in knowledge, as if they did not need to be told anything.“Paddy?” asked Fee in a voice not like her own.“Yes. And Stu.”Neither of her sons could look at her.“Stu? Stu! What do you mean, Stu? Oh, God, what is it, what’shappened? Not both of them—no!”“Daddy got caught in the fire; he’s dead. Stu must have disturbeda boar, and it charged him. He shot it, but it fell on him as it wasdying and smothered 43 him. He’s dead too, Mum.”Meggie screamed and struggled, trying to break free of Jack’shands, but Fee stood between Bob’s grimy, bloody 44 ones as if turned to stone, her eyes as glassy as a gazingball.“It is too much,” she said at last, and looked up at Bob with therain running down her face and her hair in straggling wisps aroundher neck like golden runnels. “Let me go to them, Bob. I am thewife of one and the mother of one. You can’t keep me away—youhave no right to keep me away. Let me go to them.”Meggie had quietened, and stood within Jack’s arms with herhead on his shoulder. 
 

具有讽刺意味的是，大雨使空气变得阴冷，大理石炉膛里面烧起了熊熊的火。
　　"鲍勃，你怎么想？"杰克问道。
　　"我认为，该到我们去找他的时候了。他也许受了伤，或者在徒步行走，得走很长的路才能到家；也许他的马被吓坏了，把他抛了下来，躺在什么地方动不了了。他只带着隔夜粮，尽管他还不至于饿死，可是那些食物支持四天，无论如何也不够。眼下最好是不要制造大惊小怪的气氛，这样我就用不着把奈仁甘的人叫回来了。但是，假如我们在天黑之前找不到他的话，我就骑马到多米尼克那儿去。明天我们会到整个地区打听去的。老天爷呀，我希望电话总局的那帮家伙赶紧让那些电话线路忙起来！"
　　菲在发着抖，她的两眼发出了疯狂的光，几乎快狂乱了。"我要把长裤穿上，"她说，"坐在这里等，我受不了。"
　　"妈，呆在家里吧！"鲍勃恳求道。
　　"鲍勃，要是他在哪里受了伤，随时随时都会出事的。你已经把收工们派到奈仁甘去了，这使我们出去寻找极缺人物。要是我陪梅吉一起去的话，不管遇到什么情况，我们在一起都会有足够的力量对付的。可是，如果梅吉一个人去，就得由你们中间的一个人陪着她一起去寻找，那对她来说是一种浪费，更甭提我了。"
　　鲍勃让步了。"那好吧。你可以骑梅吉的那匹阉马，你已经骑着它去过火场了。每个人都带上一支步枪，多带些子弹。"
　　他们骑马出发了，越过小河，来到了那片被烧毁的地区的中心地带。无论何处都看不到一样绿色或灰色的东西，只有一大片湿透的黑色炭灰，在下了几个小时的雨以后，仍然在令人难以置信地冒着蒸汽。每一棵树上的每片叶子都成了柔软而卷曲的纤维。在以前曾是草地的地方。到处都能看见一小堆黑乎乎的东西。这是被火烧死的绵羊，以及意外被火烧死的阉牛或野猪这样大一些的动物。他们脸上的泪水和雨水搅在了一起。
　　鲍勃和梅吉走在这支小小队伍的前头，杰克和休吉在中间，菲和斯图尔特殿后。对菲和斯图尔特来说，这段路程是十分平静的。由于他们紧紧地靠在一起，心里感到了慰藉，他们没有说话，能以互相结伴而感到满足。有时，马匹因为发现了什么可怕的迹象忽而靠紧。忽而分开，但对最后这对骑手似乎没有什么影响。泥泞使他们走得缓慢而艰难，但是地面上一族一丛烧焦的草却象是一层粗纤维织成的地毯，使马有了落脚之处。在远处地平线上的每一个围栏都使他们抱着能看到帕迪出现在那里的希望，可是时间一分一秒地过去了，他却始终没有出现。
　　他们的心沉甸甸的，发觉起火的地点比他们想象的要远得多，是在芸香树围场那边。在大火已经烧出很远的时候，他们一定是把风暴云错当成烟了。起火的分界区使人目瞪口呆。在一条清晰而歪扭的分界线的一侧只乘下了闪着光的黑焦油，而另一侧则是他们所习见的土地，呈现出浅褐色和青灰色，在雨中显得十分阴郁，但却生机勃勃。鲍勃停了下来，边往回退，边对大家说道：
　　"喂，我们就从这儿开始吧。我从这儿往正面方向去，这个方向可能性最大，而且我的身体最壮实。每个人都带足弹药了吗？好。要是你们发现了什么，就往天上开三枪，凡是听到枪声的人必须开一枪作为回答。然后就等着。不管三枪是谁打的，五分钟之后要再打三枪，而且每隔五分钟都要打三枪。听到的人打一枪回答。
　　"杰克，你顺着起火线寻找。休吉，你往西南方向去。我往两去。妈和梅吉，你们往西北去。斯图沿着起火线往正北去。每个人都走得慢一些。下雨天要看远不容易，而且这里到处都有树林。常喊着点儿，也许在爹看不到你的地方能听到你的声音。不过要记住，除非你看到了什么，否则不许开枪，因为他身边没带枪，要是他听见枪声，会不停地大喊大叫的，这对他很不利。
　　"祝大家好运气，上帝保佑你们。"
　　就象香客到了最后一个叉路口一样，他们在灰蒙蒙的、连绵不断的雨中分头去了，彼此越高越远，身影越来越小，终于各自消失在预定好的道路上。
　　斯图尔特仅仅走了半英里，这时，他发现离起火线很近的地方有一片被烧焦的树林。那里有一棵小芸香树，又黑又皱，就象一个黑色的小拖把。紧挨着烧焦的分界线处，残留着一株高大的树桩。他所看到的是帕迪的马，四蹄平躺，和一可大桉树的树干烧结在一起了；而帕迪的那两条狗变成了硬挺挺的小黑东西，四肢就象棍子似地伸着。他从马上下来，泥浆没到了靴子的踝部，他从鞍鞘中把步枪取了下来。他双唇在翕动着，一边滑滑跌跌地穿过硬木炭，一边在祈祷着。要不是看到马和儿，他会希望那是一个流浪者或是一个累垮的徒步旅行者被火烧着了，陷入了困境。但是，帕迪是骑着马，带着五条狗的，在这条路上谁也不会骑着马，带着一条以上的狗的。这是深入德罗海达腹地的地方，不可能认为这是赶脚的牲口商，或是从布吉拉往西去的牧工。远处，是另外三条被烧焦的狗；一共是五条狗。他知道，他不会找到第六条了，他也找不到。
　　离那匹马不远的地方有一根圆木，当他走到近前时，发现那里窝着一个被烧焦的人。这不会错了。那人背靠着地躺着，在雨中闪着光。后背弯得象张大弓，中间凹，两头向上弯起，除了肩头和臀部，其他部分都不挨着地面。那人两臂张开着，扬了起来，肘中弯曲，就好象是在苦苦哀求着；皮内尽脱，露出了焦骨的手指成了瓜形，好象抓了一个空。两条腿也是张开的，但是两膝折曲，黑乎乎的头部茫然地望着天空。
　　斯图尔特敏锐的神线呆呆地在他父亲的身上停了一会儿。他看到的不是一个毁坏了的躯壳，而是一个人，就好象他还活着似的。他把步枪指向天空，开了一枪，又装上一粒子弹，开了第二枪，再装了一粒子弹，第三枪也打响了。他隐隐地听见远处有一声回答的枪响，接着，在更远的地方传来了极其微弱的枪声，这是第二个回答。随后他便想起，较近的枪声大概是来自他母亲和姐姐的。她们是往西北，他是往北。他没有等到规定的五分钟，便又往枪膛里装上了一粒子弹，把枪指向了正西方，开了枪。停顿了一下，重新上子弹，开第二枪，再上子弹，第三枪。他将武器放在了身后的地面上，站在那里望着南边，翘首谛听着。这一次，头一声回答是从西边来的，这是鲍勃开的枪，第二个回答是来自杰克或休吉，第三个回答来自母亲。他冲着步枪叹了口气，他不希望是你最先赶到他这里。
　　这样，他没有看见在北边的树林里出现了一头硕大的野猪，但是他闻到了野猪的气息。这头野猪体大如牛，笨重的躯干滚圆溜肥；当它低头拱着潮湿的地皮走过来的时候，那短而有力的腿在颤抖着。枪声惊动了它，它正在痛苦中挣扎呢。它身体一侧的稀疏的黑毛被烧光了，露出了鲜红的肉。当斯图尔特凝视着南边的时候，他闻到的正是那股烤猪皮的香味，就象是从锅里冒出的一股烤肘子的味道，被砍伤的表皮全都烤跪了。他琢磨着他以前一定到过这个地方，这片湿透了的，黑色的土地在他降生之日就已经铭刻在他大脑的某一部分之中了；恰在此时，他从这种似乎早就体验过的、今人难以理解的平静的忧伤中惊觉了过来，他转过头去。
　　他弯下腰去摸枪，想起它还没有上膛。那头公野猪一动不动地站在那里，发红的小眼睛由于疼痛而显得疯狂，黄色的獠牙十分尖利，呈半圆形向上翘着。斯图尔特的马嘶叫起来，它嗅到那畜牲的气味了。野猪转过笨重的脑袋望着它，随后放低姿势准备攻击了。在它的注意力转向那匹马的时候，斯图尔特找到了唯一的机会，他飞快地弯腰抓直了步枪，啪地拉开枪栓，另一只手从茄克衫的口袋里摸出一颗子弹。四面还在下着雨，那持续的嗒嗒雨声盖住了其他响声。但是，野猪却听到了枪机向后滑动的声音，在最后的一刻，它将攻击的方向从马转向了斯图尔特。当他一枪直射进那畜牲的胸膛时，野猪已经快扑到他身上了，但是它的速度一点儿也没有减低。那对獠牙斜了一下，扑偏了，撞在了他的肋上。他跌倒在地上，血就象开足了的水龙头似地涌了出来，浸透了他的衣服，喷了满地。
　　当野猪感觉到吃了子弹的时候，便拙笨地掉过身来，它踉跄着，摇晃着，步履蹒跚地用獠牙刺他。那1500镑的身体压在了他的身上，将他的脸压进了满是柏树脂的泥浆之中。有那么一会儿，他的双手抓着两边的土地，狂乱而徒劳地挣扎着，试图挣出来，这种时刻也是他早就料到的，这就是为什么他从没有过希望、梦想和计划，只是坐在那里，沉迷于生气勃勃的世界，没有时间为自己的命运而痛苦伤悲的原因。他在想着，"妈，妈！我为能和你在一起了，妈！"甚至当他的心脏在体内爆裂的时候，他还在这样想着。
　　"我不明白，斯图为什么不再开枪呢？"梅吉问她妈妈。她们策马向着两次连放三枪的地方小跑着，在泥泞之中无法跑得再快了，她们感到心急如火。
　　"我猜，他一定是认为我们已经听到了，"菲说道。但是，在思想深处她却在回忆着分头往不同方向去寻找时，斯图尔特的脸色；回忆着他伸手抓住她的手时的神态，和他向她微笑时的样子。"我们现在离得不会太远了，"她说着，逼着她的马不灵活地、一滑一跌地慢跑着。
　　可是，杰克已经先到了那里，鲍勃也到了。当他们从那最后一片充满生机的土地上向这大火燃起的地方奔来时，他们抢在了女人的面前。
　　"别过来，妈，"当她下马的时候，鲍勃说道。
　　杰克跑到梅吉的身边，抓住了她的胳臂。
　　那两对灰眼睛转到一边去了。当她们看到这情形的时候，并没有感到特别惶乱和恐惧，好象什么都无需告诉她们似的。
　　"是帕迪吗？"菲用一种不象是自己的声音问道。
　　"是的。还有斯图。"
　　两个儿子都不敢望她。
　　"斯图，斯图！你说什么？斯图？哦，上帝啊，这是怎么了，出什么事了？不会是他们俩吧--不会的？
　　"爹爹被火围住了，他死了。斯图一定是惊动了一头公野猪，它袭击了他。他向它开了枪，可是，在它垂死挣扎的时候，倒在了他的身上，把他压住了。他也死了，妈。"
　　梅吉尖叫了一声，挣扎了起来，试图挣脱杰克的手；可是菲却象石头人般地站在那里，鲍勃那双肮脏的、沾满血污的手抱着她。她的眼睛呆滞无光，直勾勾地望着。
　　"这太过份了，"她终于说道，抬头望着鲍勃，雨水从她的脸上流下，一缕缕的头发披散在脖子周围，就象是金黄色的涓涓细流。"鲍勃，让我到他们身边去，我是其中一个人的妻子，是另一个人的母亲。你不能让我远远地站着--你没有权利让我远远地站着。让我到他们身边去。"
　　梅吉一言不发，站在那里，依在杰克的怀抱中，两手抱着他的肩头。