ESL之人际交往 08 Making a Move on Someone

08 Making a Move on Someone

GLOSSARY

cozy – very comfortable and close* Betti spent a cozy evening at home, sitting on her favorite chair with a warmblanket, a good book, her cat, and a hot cup of tea.

upset – a negative feeling of unhappiness, sadness, and anger* The boys were very upset when they lost the baseball game on Saturday.

to mess up – to make a mistake; to do something wrong or incorrectly* Andrea messed up her dance performance by accidentally falling in the middleof the song.

to reassure – to make someone feel better about something; to help someonefeel less worried, doubtful, or scared about something* Trisha was very worried about losing her job, but her boss reassured her by telling her that she won’t be fired if she continues doing good work.

to comfort – to try to make someone feel better when he or she is sad,frightened, or worried about something* When Brian is stressed or worried about school, he sometimes tries to comforthimself by eating, but that isn’t very healthy.

to make a move on (someone) – to do or say something to try to begin aromantic or sexual relationship with someone* Paul and Rebecca have always been good friends, but yesterday Paul made amove on her by reaching for her hand while they were watching a movietogether.

ridiculous – absurd; unreasonable; not possible to believe; very silly* Don’t you think it’s ridiculous to pay $100,000 for a car?

to notice – to pay attention to something; to see or hear something and becomeaware of it* Janette was reading a book while she was walking, so she didn’t notice the bighole in the sidewalk and she almost fell into it!

to hit on (someone) – to do or say something to try to meet someone for aromantic or sexual relationship* Men often hit on women in bars by offering to buy them drinks.

sexual harassment – inappropriate words or touching that are offensive and/orillegal at work because they are related to sex* The trainer at work told us that we should never tell sexual jokes at work,because people who hear them might think that they are a type of sexualharassment.

to compare apples and oranges – to compare two things that are very different;to look for things that are the same between two things that are very different* Comparing the salaries of computer programmers in Singapore and the UnitedStates is like comparing apples and oranges, because those programmers live incountries with very different economies.

observant – aware of what is happening around oneself; paying attention tothings that are said and done; easily able to notice things* Police officers are taught to be very observant so that they can easily remember the faces of people they see where crimes happen.

to mark (one’s) words – to listen carefully to what one is saying and rememberit for the future* Mark my words!  That company is going to grow very quickly over the next tenyears.  We should invest in it now.

flattered – pleased to know that another person thinks one is good, pretty,talented, or smart* Fatima was flattered when her husband told her that she was the most beautifulwoman in the world.

to have all the luck – to be very lucky or fortunate* Last year Bala won a free car, a new boat, and a trip to Hawaii.  Some guys have all the luck.

To add insult to injury,… – a phrase used to describe a bad situation that is becoming worse; something bad or negative happening after something bad ornegative has already happened * This morning Chris spilled coffee on his shirt, lost his car keys, and couldn’t finda place to park his car.  To add insult to injury, when he got to the office his computer wouldn’t start and his phone was broken!

What can I say? – a question used to show that one is helpless and has nocontrol over a situation* Bala’s friends were jealous when he won a free car, a new boat, and a trip toHawaii.  He just smiled and said, “What can I say?  I guess I’m lucky.”

COMPREHENSION QUESTIONS1.  What reason does Gloria give for Tiago sitting close to her?

a)  He was messing up her presentation.

b)  He was reassuring and comforting her.

c)  He was making a move on her.

2.  What does Gloria mean when she talks about comparing apples andoranges?

a)  It was hard for her to get Paul to stop throwing fruit at her.

b)  She is very observant when comparing apples and oranges.

c)  Tiago and Paul treated her is very different ways.

______________WHAT ELSE DOES IT MEAN?

to make a move onThe phrase “to make a move on (someone),” in this podcast, means to do or say something to try to begin a romantic or sexual relationship with someone:

“Harvey made a move on Gertrude by bringing her flowers and chocolate whenshe was sick.”  The phrase “to move on to (something)” means to begin doingsomething new or to start talking about something new: “If no one has anythingelse to say about the marketing plan, let’s move on to the next item of business.” The phrase “to move on” can also mean to start leaving a place, especially if oneis in a vehicle: “At an accident, police officers often ask drivers to please move onand not drive more slowly to see what happened.”

to noticeIn this podcast, the verb “to notice” means to pay attention to something, or tosee or hear something and become aware of it: “Did you notice that Chanterellewas crying?  I wonder what happened.”  The phrase “to give (a number) weeks’

notice” means to tell one’s employer that one is going to stop working there in anumber of weeks: “At most companies, employees are asked to give two weeks’

notice before they quit.”  The phrases “on short notice” and “with short notice”

mean without knowing about something in advance, or being surprised by something: “Felipe read about a good job opportunity, but he had to finish his application on short notice, because applications had to be sent to the company by the next day.”

CULTURE NOTEIn the United States, most companies and organizations have sexual harassmentpolicies.  A “policy” is something that is written to describe what a person ororganization will do in a specific situation, so a “sexual harassment policy” is awritten description of what a company will do when there is sexual harassment atwork.

Most sexual harassment policies begin with definitions of sexual harassment anddescriptions of the types of “behavior” (actions) that might be sexual harassment. Some common types of sexual harassment include “dirty jokes” (jokes that aresexual), “comments” or things that are said about a person’s “physicalappearance” (how one looks), and touching that is not wanted or welcomed.

At most companies, the person who is the “victim” (a person who has been hurtby a wrong or illegal activity) is supposed to ask the “harasser” (the person whois doing the sexual harassment) to stop.  If the victim is too uncomfortable to dothis, he or she should report it to his or her “supervisor” (boss).  If the sexually harassing behavior continues, the supervisor will talk to the harasser and “report”

(give information about something) the sexual harassment to the “humanresources department,” which is the department in a company that is responsiblefor taking care of employees.

The harasser is usually given “written warnings” (letters) that tell him or her that ifthe behavior doesn’t stop, he or she will be “fired” (lose his or her job).  If theharasser doesn’t believe that he or she is “engaging in” (doing) sexually harassing behavior, he or she can go to a committee of people at the company to“plead his or her case,” meaning that he or she will explain the situation from his or her point of view.  Then the committee can make a final decision.

______________Comprehension Questions Correct Answers:  1 – b; 2 – c

COMPLETE TRANSCRIPTWelcome to English as a Second Language Podcast number 266: Making aMove on Someone.

This is English as a Second Language Podcast episode 266.  I'm your host, Dr.

Jeff McQuillan, coming to you from the Center for Educational Development inbeautiful Los Angeles, California.

Remember to visit our website at eslpod.com and download the Learning Guidefor this episode. Our episode number 266 is called “Making a Move on Someone.”  It's aconversation between A.J. and Gloria about a man who A.J. thinks is romantically interested in Gloria.  Sounds interesting.  Let's get started.

[start of story]

A.J.:  What was going on with you and Tiago in his office earlier today?  You twowere pretty cozy in there.

Gloria:  What?  Oh, I was a little upset about messing up my presentation in themorning meeting, and Tiago was trying to reassure me about it.

A.J.:  It looked like he was doing more than comforting you.  He was sitting really close to you and he had his hand on your shoulder.  If you ask me, he was making a move on you.

Gloria:  Don’t be ridiculous!  Tiago and I are just friends. A.J.:  Would you notice if he was?  Remember Paul?  He hit on you for twoweeks before you noticed.

Gloria:  That was completely different.  He wasn’t hitting on me.  He was bothering me, and I actually had to file a sexual harassment complaint againsthim before he’d stop.  You’re comparing apples and oranges.

A.J.:  I’m just saying that you’re not the most observant person when it comes tothese kinds of things.  Mark my words.  Tiago is interested in you.

Gloria:  If he is, I’m flattered.  He’s a very attractive guy.  

A.J.:  That’s what all the women say.  Some guys have all the luck.  To add insultto injury, he doesn’t even know that women find him attractive.  Even the othermen in the office think he’s a nice guy.

Gloria:  What can I say?  Tell me the truth.  Do you really think he’s interested inme?

[end of story]

The title of this episode is “Making a Move on Someone.”  “To make move onsomeone” means to show or express your romantic interest in them.  To talk tothem, perhaps to invite them to dinner or for a coffee; that would be, or could be,making a move on someone.  You are showing the person that you areinterested in them romantically.

A.J. begins the conversation by saying, “What was going on with you and Tiago.” The expression “what's going on with” means what is happening – what is takingplace between you two.  “You two,” he says, “were pretty cozy in” the office – inhis office.  “To be cozy” (cozy) means to be very comfortable, and often very close to someone else.  If you say, “He's cozy with her,” you mean he is physically close to her.  “Cozy” can also be a general adjective to meancomfortable, very comfortable – “I am cozy sitting in my living room watchingtelevision.

Gloria is surprised by A.J.'s comments.  She says, “What?  Oh, I was a littleupset about messing up my presentation in the morning meeting.”  “To be upset”

(upset) means to be unhappy – to be sad, maybe even a little of angry or mad;that is “to be upset.”  Gloria was upset because she messed up her presentation. “To mess (mess) up” means to make a mistake; it's one of those two-word verbs – to make a mistake – “to mess up.”  To do something wrong, or to do somethingincorrectly is “to mess up.”  Usually it's a small mistake, but it could be somethingmore serious.  The word “mess” (mess), as a noun, usually means somethingthat is not clean and in good order.  Something that is disorganized would be a“mess.”  My desk, for example, is always a mess at work.  But, “to mess up”

means to make a mistake.

Gloria says, “Tiago was trying to reassure” her about her presentation.  “Toreassure” (reassure) means to make someone feel better about something – tohelp someone feel less worried or less scared about something is “to reassure”

someone.  You could say, “I was very worried about missing my airplane, but my wife reassured me that we would make it to the airport on time.”

A.J. says that “It looked,” to him – to A.J. – like Tiago “was doing more thancomforting” Gloria.  “To comfort” (comfort) means to try to make someone feelbetter when they're sad, or when they are worried – “I'm going to comfort”

someone.  We also use that word, for example, if someone dies, and you talk toone of the friends or family members, you may try to comfort them – make themfeel better because they are sad that something bad has happened.

A.J. says that Tiago “was sitting really close to” Gloria, and his hand was on hershoulder.  He says, “If you ask me, he was making a move on you.”  “If you ask me” is a common expression to mean I'm going to give you my opinion eventhough you didn't ask me, sometimes.  “If you ask me” means in my opinion.  A.J.

says that Tiago “was making a move” – showing his romantic interest in Gloria. There are other meanings of this expression, “to make a move on.”  You can lookat our Learning Guide for this episode for additional explanations.

Gloria tells A.J., “Don’t be ridiculous!”  “To be ridiculous” (ridiculous) means to beabsurd; to be silly; to be unreasonable; when you say something or do somethingthat makes you seem weird or silly or difficult to believe.  Gloria is telling A.J.,“Don't be ridiculous,” in other words, you are completely wrong.  “Tiago and I,”

she says, “are just friends.”  Ah, yes, “just friends!”  A.J. says, “Would you notice if he was,” meaning would you notice if he was making a move on you.  “To notice” (notice) means to pay attention to something;to hear or to see something and become aware of it.  A.J. is telling Gloria thatshe would not notice – she would not realize that Tiago was making a move onher. He says, “Remember Paul?  He hit on you for two weeks before you noticed.” “To hit on” someone means to say something that would express your romantic interest.  It's very similar to “to make a move on” someone.  “To hit on” someoneis to show them that you are interested in them romantically.  This is aninteresting verb, because the verb “to hit” means to punch someone or slapsomeone.  “To hit on” means to show you are romantically interested – just theopposite.  Although, if you hit on a woman who's not interested in you, you mightget hit, so be careful!

Gloria says that the situation with Paul “was completely different.  He wasn’thitting on me,” she says, “He was bothering me, and I had to file a sexualharassment complaint against him before he’d stop.”  “Sexual harassment”

(harassment) means when you do something or say something, usually at work,that is considered inappropriate, something usually related to having a romantic or sexual interest in another person.  But you do something that is against the rules; you say something or do something that makes the person feeluncomfortable.  Many companies, and the government, have rules andregulations about how people at a workplace talk to each other and behavetoward each other.  This is something that is fairly new in the last 25 years or so.

So, Gloria is saying that Paul was sexually harassing her, causing her problems. She says, “You’re comparing apples” to “oranges.”  The expression “to compareapples and oranges,” or, “apples to oranges,” means you are trying to comparetwo completely different things – things that are very different.  Even though theyare different, you are trying to say that they are the same.

A.J. says, “I’m just saying that you’re not the most observant person.”  “To beobservant” (observant) means to be aware of what is happening around you – tobe paying attention.  Someone who is observant notices things around them. A.J. is saying that Gloria is not a very observant person.

“Mark my words,” he says.  The expression “mark (mark) my words” means listencarefully to what I'm saying and remember this.  Usually it is something you say before making a prediction, or saying something that will become true in thefuture – “Mark my words.”  So, A.J. says, “Mark my words.  Tiago is interested inyou.”

Gloria says, “If he is” – if he is interested – “I’m flattered.”  “To be flattered”

(flattered) means to be happy or pleased to know that another person thinks youare good, or pretty, or smart, or talented.  Someone says, “Oh, you are a very beautiful woman,” and you say, “Oh, I'm flattered!”  Somebody said that to meonce; I wasn't flattered! A.J. says, “That’s what all women say.  Some guys have all the luck.”  Theexpression “to have all the luck” means to be very lucky; to be very fortunate. “To add insult to injury,” Tiago “doesn’t even know that women find himattractive.”  A.J. is saying, “To add insult to injury” (injury), which means that youare describing a bad situation that is even worse or becoming worse.  Somethingbad or negative that happens after something else bad and negative happens. For example, I lend a friend of mine $10, and the next day I see him and I say,“John, do you have my $10 I lent you yesterday” – he has to give me the money back.  He doesn't give me my money back; to add insult to injury, he says that Inever gave him the $10.  So, there's a bad thing – he doesn't give me back my money – followed by an even worse thing – he doesn't admit that I gave him themoney.

So, A.J. is saying that not only is Tiago an attractive guy, “he doesn't even knowthat” other “women find him attractive.”

Gloria says, at the end, “What can I say?  Tell me the truth.  Do you really think he’s interested in me?”  The expression “what can I say” is one that we usesometimes to show that you have no control over a situation; you are helpless. In this case, Gloria says, “What can I say” meaning she has nothing to do with –she is not responsible for Tiago being interested in her.  But, it's also somethingof a joke sometimes.  “What can I say, everyone loves me” means I can't help it. I'm so great that everyone loves me – that would be a funny use of thatexpression.

Gloria, of course, now is wondering if Tiago is interested in her, and so she is asking A.J.

Now let's listen to the dialogue, this time at a normal speed.

[start of story]

A.J.:  What was going on with you and Tiago in his office earlier today?  You twowere pretty cozy in there.

Gloria:  What?  Oh, I was a little upset about messing up my presentation in themorning meeting, and Tiago was trying to reassure me about it.

A.J.:  It looked like he was doing more than comforting you.  He was sitting really close to you and he had his hand on your shoulder.  If you ask me, he was making a move on you.

Gloria:  Don’t be ridiculous!  Tiago and I are just friends. A.J.:  Would you notice if he was?  Remember Paul?  He hit on you for twoweeks before you noticed.

Gloria:  That was completely different.  He wasn’t hitting on me.  He was bothering me, and I actually had to file a sexual harassment complaint againsthim before he’d stop.  You’re comparing apples and oranges.

A.J.:  I’m just saying that you’re not the most observant person when it comes tothese kinds of things.  Mark my words.  Tiago is interested in you.

Gloria:  If he is, I’m flattered.  He’s a very attractive guy.  

A.J.:  That’s what all the women say.  Some guys have all the luck.  To add insultto injury, he doesn’t even know that women find him attractive.  Even the othermen in the office think he’s a nice guy.

Gloria:  What can I say?  Tell me the truth.  Do you really think he’s interested inme?

[end of story]

The script for today's podcast was written by Dr. Lucy Tse. From Los Angeles, California, I'm Jeff McQuillan.  Thanks for listening.  We'll seeyou next time on ESL Podcast.

English as a Second Language Podcast is written and produced by Dr. Lucy Tse,hosted by Dr. Jeff McQuillan.  This podcast is copyright 2007.