生活大爆炸第三季第九集_1

 　　两年之后  突然有人敲门了

　　So two years later, there's a knock on the door.
　　那人打开门  看见门口立着只蜗牛
　　Guy opens it, and there on his porch is the snail 1,
　　蜗牛说  "这TM是怎么回事?"
　　who says, "What the heck was all that about?"
　　我不知道笑点在哪儿
　　I don't really get it.
　　你看  蜗牛花了两年的时间才...
　　Well, see, it took two years for the snail to...
　　那不重要
　　Not important.
　　-我能问你个问题吗  -当然
　　- Can I ask you a question?  - Sure.
　　你认为我们会发展到什么程度
　　Where do you think this is going?
　　老实说  我本来希望至少上个二垒
　　To be honest, I was hoping at least second base.
　　你真风趣
　　You're so funny.
　　你就像是个单口相声演员
　　You're like a stand-up comedian 2.
　　一个犹太单口相声演员  这很新鲜
　　A Jewish stand-up comedian, that'd be new.
　　事实上  我觉得他们当中很多都是犹太人
　　Actually, I think a lot of them are Jewish.
　　不  我只是  算了
　　No, I was just... Never mind.
　　霍华德  这是我们的第三次约会
　　Look, Howard, this is our third date
　　我们都知道这意味着什么
　　and we both know what that means.
　　-都知道吗  -性
　　- We do?  - Sex.
　　你开玩笑的吧
　　You're kidding.
　　但我需要知道你是要谈
　　But I need to know whether you're looking
　　一场恋爱还是要一夜情
　　for a relationship or a one-night stand.
　　好的  只是搞清楚点
　　Okay, just to be clear:
　　这个问题只有一个正确答案吗
　　there's only one correct answer, right?
　　而不是飞机选餐里的要"鸡肉还是鱼肉"
　　It's not like "chicken or fish" on an airplane?
　　也许你需要认真思考一下这个问题了
　　Maybe you need to think about it a little.
　　也不是没有过
　　You know, it's not unheard of
　　从一夜情发展为恋爱关系的事
　　for a one-night stand to turn into a relationship.
　　等你想明白了再给我打电话
　　Call me when you figure it out.
　　三次约会意味着性
　　Three dates means sex?
　　谁知道啊
　　Who knew?
　　向你致敬  宅男
　　Greetings, homies.
　　宅女
　　Homette.
　　为什么这么早就结束约会回来了
　　Why are you back from your date so early?
　　谈恋爱  就要跟在娱乐业一样
　　In romance, as in show business,
　　总是要让观众欲求不满
　　always leave them wanting more.
　　这到底是什么意思
　　What exactly does that mean?
　　他被三振出局了
　　He struck out.
　　你们两个知道
　　Hey, did either of you guys know
　　与同一个女人约会三次
　　that three dates with the same woman
　　就可以上床的临界点?
　　is the threshold for sex?
　　事实上  我从未与同一女人约会三次
　　Actually, I've never had three dates with the same woman.
　　而我和佩妮花了两年
　　With Penny and me, it took two years.
　　现在认真回想一下  的确是三次约会
　　Now that I think about it, that was three dates.
　　好吧  那在你和佩妮搞上之前
　　Okay, well, before you and Penny hooked up,
　　她有没有要求什么承诺
　　Did she ask for any kind of commitment?
　　没  她倒是非常清楚地表示
　　No, she was pretty clear about
　　要有保持随时换人的权力
　　wanting to keep her options open.
　　我有东西要宣布一下
　　I have something to announce,
　　但是出于惯例  我会等你们
　　but out of respect for convention, I will wait for you
　　说完现在的话题
　　to finish your current conversation.
　　你们在聊什么呢
　　What are you talking about?
　　一种文化模式
　　The cultural paradigm 3 in which people have sex
　　就是人们会在三次约会后做爱
　　after three dates.
　　原来如此
　　I see.
　　现在我们是说的"date"是指社交活动
　　Now, are we talking "date," the social interaction,
　　还是指干枣
　　or "date," the dried fruit?
　　算了  你要宣布什么
　　Never mind, what's your announcement?
　　很好  轮到我了  这令人非常兴奋
　　Oh, good, my turn. Well, this is very exciting
　　并且我想让你们最先知道
　　and I wanted you to be among the first to know...
　　嗨  库珀
　　Hey, Cooper.
　　我听说你下周要和《科学星期五》的
　　I hear you're going to be on the radio
　　艾拉?弗雷托上广播节目
　　with Ira Flatow from Science Friday next week.
　　谢谢  克瑞普克  剥夺了我跟我的朋友
　　Thank you, Kripke, for depriving me of the opportunity
　　分享这则新闻的机会
　　to share my news with my friends.
　　很荣幸
　　My pleasure.
　　我的"谢谢"可不是诚恳的
　　My "thank you" was not sincere.
　　但我的"很荣幸"是的
　　But "my pleasure" is.
　　让我问你个问题
　　Let me ask you a question:
　　什么时候国家公共广播
　　At what point did National Public Radio
　　不得不邀请一些废材
　　have to start scraping the bottom of the barrel
　　作为嘉宾呢
　　for its guests?
　　别回答  这是个比喻
　　Don't answer. It's rhetorical.
　　为什么你是个笨蛋
　　Why are you such a stupid head?
　　这也是个比喻
　　That is also rhetorical.
　　真抱歉你们不得不听到这些
　　I'm sorry you had to hear that.
　　你真的要上国家公共广播吗
　　Are you really going to be on NPR?
　　没错  他们通过我办公室的电话采访我
　　Yes, they're interviewing me by phone from my office,
　　问一些最近所谓的"发现"
　　regarding the recent so-called "discovery"
　　关于自旋冰中的磁单极子
　　of magnetic monopoles in spin-ices.
　　因为是誓言周  他们想通过一些辩论
　　It's pledge week and they're trying to goose the ratings
　　来提高收听率
　　with a little controversy 4.
　　真酷  恭喜你
　　Very cool, congratulations.
　　谢谢  我妈妈也非常兴奋
　　Thank you. My mother is very excited.
　　她召集了她的圣经学习小组来收听
　　She's convening 5 her Bible study group to listen in,
　　然后为我的灵魂祈祷
　　and then pray for my soul.
　　我曾经上过一次电台
　　I was on the radio once.
　　我打进了新德里的狂热FM104的热线
　　I called in to Fever 104 FM New Delhi
　　成为了第四个说一句话就能拿钱的人
　　and was the fourth person to say the phrase that pays:
　　"狂热104   aajke naye  acchha sangeetka ghar."
　　"Fever 104, aajke naye  acchha sangeetka ghar."
　　意思是  "狂热104
　　That means: "Fever 104,
　　超棒流行音乐之家
　　home of the really good current music."
　　还是在印度语里说更拉风
　　It's much catchier 6 in Hindi.
　　好的  这些是明天上国家公共广播
　　All right. These are the talking points
　　访谈的讲点
　　for my NPR interview tomorrow.
　　我必须确定它们对于那些
　　I need to make sure that they're simple enough
　　教育程度较低的听众来说也足够简单易懂
　　for the less educated in the audience to understand.
　　霍华德  看一遍然后告诉我你哪里不懂
　　Howard, look this over and tell me what's unclear to you.
　　劳驾  我有麻省理工大学的
　　Excuse me, I have a master's degree in engineering
　　工程硕士学位证书
　　from the Massachusetts Institute of Technology.
　　要求修完144个学分
　　It required the completion of 144 units of grad work
　　和一篇原创论文
　　and an original thesis.
　　没错
　　Yes.
　　看完告诉我有哪些不清楚的
　　Look this over and tell me what's unclear to you.
　　谢尔顿让你做事
　　You know, when Sheldon gives you homework,
　　你可以拒绝
　　you don't have to do it.
　　其实你拒绝更好
　　In fact, it's better if you don't,
　　不然搞得我们几个很尴尬
　　otherwise it makes the rest of us look bad.
　　-各位好  -你好
　　- Hi, guys. - Hey. Hello.
　　拉杰  跟我说话
　　Yo, Raj, talk to me.
　　抱歉  耍你而已
　　I'm sorry, just screwing with you.
　　霍华德  你干嘛不打电话给伯纳黛特
　　Hey, Howard, why haven't you called Bernadette?
　　她说什么了吗
　　Did she say something?
　　她说你一个星期没跟她联系了
　　Yeah, she said she hasn't heard from you in a week.
　　我以为你喜欢她呢
　　I thought you liked her?
　　是喜欢  但她要我给个承诺
　　I do, but she wants a commitment
　　我又不确定她是不是我喜欢的类型
　　and I'm not sure she's my type.
　　她都愿意免费跟你约会
　　She agreed to go out with you for free.
　　你还想怎么样
　　What more do you need?
　　伯纳黛特是很好
　　Look, Bernadette is really nice.
　　我只是一直觉得  当我想认真的对待感情时
　　I just always thought when I finally settle down
　　对方应该是一个
　　into a relationship, it would be with someone,
　　你知道  一个特别的人
　　you know, different.
　　怎么特别
　　Different how?
　　更像《变形金刚》里的梅根?福克斯啦
　　Well, you know, more like Megan Fox from Transformers.
　　或者《太空堡垒卡拉狄加》里的
　　Or Katee Sackhoff
　　凯蒂?萨克霍夫啦
　　from Battlestar Galactica.
　　你嗑药啦
　　Are you high?
　　你跟《宇宙威龙》里有三个咪咪的
　　You'd have a better shot with the three-breasted
　　火星妓女在一起的可能性更大点
　　Martian hooker from Total Recall.
　　你说的太不实际了
　　Okay, now you're just being unrealistic.
　　那部电影都差不多20年了
　　Anyway, that movie was like 20 years ago.
　　想想那些咪咪该下垂成什么样了
　　Imagine how saggy 7 those thing would be.
　　霍华德  你想守着你的荒诞幻想不放
　　Howard, you're going to throw away a great girl like Bernadette
　　而放过像伯纳黛特这么好的女生吗
　　because you're holding out for some ridiculous fantasy?
　　你的感情定下来了不代表我也要这样吧
　　Hey, just because you settled doesn't mean I have to.
　　喂  我在这坐着呢
　　Excuse me, I'm sitting here.