TED演讲 第59期:极点往返-我生命中最艰苦的105天(4)

 And I sound like a bit of a fraud standing 1 here now with a sort of belly 2.  我听上去就像 无助的站在那儿朝旷野呼唤的人。

I've put on 30 pounds in the last three weeks.  在过去三周，我已增重30磅。
Being that hungry has left an interesting mental scar,  在那样的饥饿状态下 导致了另一个有意思的后遗症，
which is that I've been hoovering up every hotel buffet 3 that I can find.  我一直在找我能找到的所有酒店自助餐。
But we were genuinely quite hungry, and in quite a bad way.  但我们确实饿得不行 身体状况极其糟糕。
I don't regret calling for that plane for a second,  我并不后悔 呼叫了那趟飞机，
because I'm still standing here alive,  因为我还活着站在这儿，
with all digits 4 intact, telling this story.  记述所有细节 诉说着这个故事。
But getting external assistance like that was never part of the plan,  但是获得那样的额外援助 绝不是计划的一部分。
and it's something my ego 5 is still struggling with.  这也是我的良心仍旧苦苦挣扎的地方。
This was the biggest dream I've ever had,  这是我有生以来最大的梦想，
and it was so nearly perfect.  它近乎完美。
On the way back down to the coast,  再回海岸的路上，
our crampons a” they're the spikes 6 on our boots that we have for traveling over this blue ice on the glacier 7  我们的破冰撬，他们是我们，在这个蓝色冰川上行进的砥柱坏掉了。
broke on the top of the Beardmore.  就在本德穆尔冰川制高点。
We still had 100 miles to go downhill on very slippery rock-hard blue ice.  在这些难以攀岩的蓝冰上，我们还有100英里要走下去。
They needed repairing almost every hour.  几乎每小时，他们就要修一下。
To give you an idea of scale,  给你们个大体上的概念吧，
this is looking down towards the mouth of the Beardmore Glacier.  这就像是从本德穆尔冰川顶上向下看。
You could fit the entirety of Manhattan in the gap on the horizon.  你可以在曼哈顿的间隙瞭望到整个视野。
That's 20 miles between Mount Hope and Mount Kiffin.  霍普山与凯芙琳山间隔20英里。
I've never felt as small as I did in Antarctica.  在亚特兰地，我从未感到自己如此渺小。
When we got down to the mouth of the glacier,  当我们走到冰川口时，
we found fresh snow had obscured the dozens of deep crevasses 8.  发现新下的雪已经覆盖了岩洞的裂口。
One of Shackleton's men described crossing this sort of terrain 9 as like walking over the glass roof of a railway station.  一位沙克雷顿成员描述了 走过这层冰川的感觉就像走过铁路表面一样。
We fell through more times than I can remember,  我己经记不得有多少次，
usually just putting a ski or a boot through the snow.  我们在雪上放一块 雪橇或木板来看有没有洞。
Occasionally we went in all the way up to our armpits,  偶尔，我们会掉进我们的窝，
but thankfully never deeper than that.  但感谢上帝，没有更深了。
And less than five weeks ago, after 105 days,  五周前，也就是105天后，
we crossed this oddly inauspicious finish line,  我们越过了终点线。
the coast of Ross Island on the New Zealand side of Antarctica.  在亚特兰地新西兰的罗斯群岛海岸线。
You can see the ice in the foreground and the sort of rubbly 10 rock behind that.  你可以看到在前边的冰以及后边风化的岩石。
Behind us lay an unbroken ski trail of nearly 1,800 miles.  在我们后面，有一条长达1800英里 未被破坏的冰线。
We'd made the longest ever polar journey on foot,  我们曾徒步走完了有史以来最长的极圈旅程，
something I'd been dreaming of doing for a decade.  这我已梦想了几十年了。
And looking back,  回首往事，
I still stand by all the things I've been saying for years about the importance of goals and determination and self-belief, 我依然支持我数年来所说的有关目标，决心，及自信的重要性，
but I'll also admit that I hadn't given much thought to what happens，  但我也承认我并未充分考虑，
when you reach the all-consuming goal that you've dedicated 11 most of your adult life to,  当你完成所有预定目标时会发生的事这些目标是你成人生活中为之贡献一生的，
and the reality is that I'm still figuring that bit out.  现实就是，我还在想要阐明它。
As I said, there are very few superficial signs that I've been away.  我也说过，几乎没有迹象表明我离开过。
I've put on 30 pounds.  我增重了30磅。
I've got some very faint, probably covered in makeup 12 now, frostbite scars.  我有了些淡淡的可能现在已消失的小红斑，
I've got one on my nose, one on each cheek, from where the goggles 13 are,  鼻子上，脸颊上各一处， 都是被护目镜压出来的。
but inside I am a very different person indeed.  但内里，我改头换面了。
If I'm honest,  如果要我诚实到来，
Antarctica challenged me and humbled 14 me so deeply that I'm not sure I'll ever be able to put it into words.  亚特兰地如此深入的挑战我并改变了我这是不能用言语描述的变化。
I'm still struggling to piece together my thoughts.  我仍在竭力重组我的想法。
That I'm standing here telling this story is proof that we all can accomplish great things,  我站在这儿讲这个故事的原因就是，为了证明我们都能完成伟大的事情。
through ambition, through passion,  通过雄心，通过激情，
through sheer stubbornness,  通过傲慢，固执，
by refusing to quit,  通过拒绝离开，
that if you dream something hard enough, as Sting said,  如果你梦想的事足够艰难，正如斯蒂芬说过的，
it does indeed come to pass.  它确然能实现。
But I'm also standing here saying, you know what,  但我也站在这儿告诉你们，
that cliche 15 about the journey being more important than the destination?  你们应当知道的是，路途远必目的地重要？
There's something in that.  有据可循。
The closer I got to my finish line,  我越靠近我的终点线，
that rubbly, rocky coast of Ross Island,  罗斯群岛粗陋的海岸，
the more I started to realize that the biggest lesson，  我越发开始意识到这次很长，很难的徒步，
that this very long, very hard walk might be teaching me，  带给我的最大教训， 那就是，
is that happiness is not a finish line,  对我们人类来说，
that for us humans,  幸福不是终点线，
the perfection that so many of us seem to dream of might not ever be truly attainable 16, 我们许多人所梦想的完美也许遥不可及。
and that if we can't feel content here, today, now, on our journeys amidst the mess and the striving that we all inhabit, 如果我们不能在此时，此地，此行中 感到知足，承认我们继承的混乱与无序，
the open loops, the half-finished to-do lists,  打开的屋顶 完成一半的清单，
the could-do-better-next-times,  也许下次会更好的想法，
then we might never feel it.  那我们可能永远感受不到它。
A lot of people have asked me, what next?  许多人曾问过我，接下来呢？
Right now, I am very happy just recovering and in front of hotel buffets 17.  现在，我很高兴刚从旅馆自助餐后遗症中恢复过来。
But as Bob Hope put it,  但就像鲍勃霍普期望的，
I feel very humble,  我感到很卑微。
but I think I have the strength of character to fight it.  但我认为我有强大的人格来与他斗争。
Thank you.  谢谢。