新思路单项技能教材 口语（PETS）三级 19-22_new

Nineteen  Nothing Much

[00:04.60]A famer is returning home after a long trip,and is met by his son at the station.

[00:14.05]This is the conversation that they have on their way home.

[00:19.62]"So,has anything happened while I've been away?"

[00:25.36]"Nothing much.I can't think of anything at all worth mentioning."

[00:33.31]"Come on,I've been away for weeks.

[00:39.37]Surelly something must have happened in all that time."

[00:44.83]"Well,come to think of it,our dog died."

[00:50.68]"Stubby died?How awful!Still,he was getting on in years,

[00:59.92]and I suppose it had to happen some time.How did he die?"

[01:06.59]"The vet 1 said it was probably from eating the rotten meat."

[01:13.35]"The rotten meat?Since when do we leave rotten meat lying around for the dog to eat?"

[01:23.41]"Well,it was the horses.

[01:29.97]They'd been rotting for some time after the barn burned down."

[01:36.13]"Good heavens.How in the world did the barn burn down?"

[01:42.79]"It must have been some embers that blew over from the house."

[01:49.87]"The house!The house burnt down,too?How did the house burn down?"

[01:58.02]"Well,someone must have knocked over a candle."

[02:05.00]"Oh,Wati a moment-we don't use candles anymore to light the house!

[02:14.74]What were the candles doing there?"

[02:19.49]"They were there for the wake." "The wake!Whose wake?"

[02:27.04]"Grandma's.She passed away quite suddenly."

[02:32.61]"Oh my Lord.What did grandma die of?"

[02:39.45]"It must have been the shock." "The shock?"

[02:45.62]"Yes,the shock.When mother ran off with the farmhand the day after you left.

[02:53.87]But aside from all that,it's been fairly quiet while you've been away."

[03:00.11]Twenty An A in English

[03:06.38]Little Sammy was doing very badly in English.

[03:11.14]His parents had tried everything:flash cards,special learning centers,

[03:18.58]in short,everything they could think of.

[03:22.84]Finally,they took Sam and enrolled 2 him in the local Catholic school.

[03:29.32]After the first day,Sam came home will a very serious look on his face.

[03:38.46]He didn't kiss his mother hello.

[03:42.12]Instead,he went straight to his room and started studying.

[03:47.76]Books and papers were spread out all over the room,

[03:53.93]and Little Sammy was hard at work.

[03:57.87]His mother was amazed.She called him down to dinner and to her surprise,

[04:06.05]the minute he was done he marched back to his roo without a word,

[04:12.11]and in no time he was back hitting the books as hard as before.

[04:18.87]This went on for sometime,day after day

[04:24.75]while the mother tried to understand what had made all the difference.

[04:30.99]Finally,little Sammy brought home his report card.

[04:36.74]He quietly laid it on the table and went up to his room and hit the books again.

[04:44.29]His mom looked at the report card,and little Sammy had got an A in English.

[04:52.15]She could no longer hold her curiosity.

[04:56.52]She went to his room and said,"Son,what was it?Was it because of the nuns 3?"

[05:04.27]Little Sammy looked at her and shook his head.

[05:08.74]"Well then,"she asked again,"was it because of the books,

[05:14.91]the discipline,the uniforms?WHAT was it?"

[05:20.47]Little Sammy looked at her and said,'Well,on the first day of school,

[05:27.63]When I saw that guy nailed to the plus sign,I knew they weren't fooling around."

[05:34.58]Twenty-one  A Man and a Bartender

[05:39.54]A man walks into a bar and says to the bartender,

[05:45.00]"Bartender,I'd like to buy the house a round of drinks,

[05:50.64]pour yourself one,and give me the bill."

[05:55.50]So,the bartender does just that and hands the man a bill for $99.

[06:02.34]The man takes the bill and says,"I haven't got any money on me."

[06:08.98]The bartender slaps the guy in the face and then throws him out into the street.

[06:17.13]The very next day the same guy walks into the bar

[06:23.37]and once again says the same thing to the bartender.

[06:28.94]The bartender looks at the guy and figures to himself

[06:34.68]that he can't possibly be stupied enough to pull the same trick twice.

[06:42.44]So he give him the benefit of the doubt,

[06:46.70]pours a round of drinks for the house,

[06:50.85]has a drink himslef and hands the guy a bill for $118.

[06:58.51]The guy takes the bill and says,"I didn't know it was so much.

[07:05.77]I haven't got that kind of money."The bartender can't believe it.

[07:13.32]He picks the guy up,beats the living daylights out of him,

[07:19.38]then throws him out into the street.

[07:24.45]The next day the same man walks back into the same bar and says,

[07:31.60]"Bartender,buy every one in the house a drink,and give me the bill."

[07:37.67]In disgust,the bartender says,"What,no drink for me this time?"

[07:45.53]The man replies,"You!?No way!You get too violent when you drink."

[07:54.67]A couple of women were plating golf one sunny Saturday morning.

[08:00.63]The first woman teed off and watched in horror

[08:06.09]as her ball headed directly toward some men playing the next hole.

[08:12.75]As luck would have it,the ball hit one of the men,

[08:17.79]and he immediately clasped his hands together at his stomach,

[08:23.25]fell to the ground and proceeded to roll around in evident agony.

[08:30.33]The woman rushed down to the man and immediately began to apologize.

[08:36.89]"please allow me to help.

[08:40.54]I'm a physical therapist and I know I could relieve your pain if you'd allow."

[08:47.99]"Ummph,oooh,nnooo,I'll be all right..I'll be fine in a few minutes.'

[08:54.96]he replied breathlessly,stil clasping his hands together at his stomach.

[09:02.33]But she persisted,and he finally allowed her to help him.

[09:08.89]She gently took his hands away and laid them to the sides.

[09:14.76]She lifted his shirt and began to massage 4 his stomach.

[09:19.73]She then asked him,"How does that feel?"

[09:24.77]"It feels great,"he replied,"but my thumb still hurts like hell."