Step by Step2000 05 Shaping and Reshaping Personality(I)

Part I Warming up

A. Tape-script:

W: Hey, Kevin. Help me fill out this personality survey. It'll be fun.

M. Oh, I don't know ...

W: Oh, come on... OK, here's the first one -- what should I put for "aggressive"?

M. Uh-oh ... I ... I'd say "very."

W: Very? Really?

M: Yeah, sure. Look at the way you drive!

W: Well, OK, so I'm a very aggressive driver ... but ... you

have to drive like that in this city, or you're gonna be hit,

because ...

M: Uh ... what's the next one?

W: “Selfish”

M: Oh, not at all

W: Really? Well, maybe just a little ... I mean, a lot of myself, I guess.

M: OK, OK, so put "not very

W: OK.

M: But you can put "extremely" for the next one.

W. What？ Oh, "Kind"？

M: Yes. Don't you think you're an extremely kind person?

W: I am? OK, if you say so. Oh, look at this next one

M. Oh, "patient"

W: Yeah.

M：Hmm ... I don't know. Sometimes you can be really patient, but other times you're not patient at all. Like, remember that time in line at the supermarket when you got...

W. OK, OK. I get your point. I'll put "sort of. '

M. OK, that's right.

W. Next one... "jealous”. ' I guess I'm sort of jealous...

M. Sort of? I'd put "very. ' Remember how angry you got when

my ex-girlfriend called the other day? I thought you're gonna raise the roof ...

W: All right, all right. "Very. '

M. Oh, OK, what's the next one?

W: That's all.

M: That's all?

W: Yeah, but now it's your turn.

B. Tape-script:

Number 1 : George; W-- Woman G--George

W: So what are you going to do after you graduate, George?

G: I'm going to start my own business.

W: Oh, really? What type of business?

G: Well, I haven't decided 1 yet, but I know I'll be successful in anything I do. In fact, I'm going to be one of the top business people in town in less than five years. Just wait and see! I have everything it takes -- I'm smart, I can organize people, and I'm full of ideas that can make money.

Number2: Karen

K--Karen

K: Hey! Look at this wallet on the sidewalk. Wow! There's lots of money in it ... but no identification 2. Mmm ... I wonder how I can find the owner? I guess I'll take it to the police station and see if anyone's reported a lost wallet.

Number 3: Pam

M:--Man P-- Pam

M: What are you doing tonight, Pam?

P: Well, I was supposed to meet Bill after work for a movie, but I don't feel like going. I think I'll go shopping instead

M: Won't Bill get mad?

P: Oh, I'm sure he can find something else to do

M: Oh?

P: Besides, I really need some new clothes. I haven't bought any for nearly a month!

M: Huh!

C. Interviews

Tape-script.

I--Interviewer F—Mr. Fisher B--Miss Burnes

I: Mr. Fisher, you are an accountant and earn a good enough salary to enable you to live comfortably. What does work mean to you?

F: I regard it as a means to an end. Basically I'm a family man, and as long as I have a job which enables me to earn enough money to live well, I'm happy. I find a comfortable life compensates 4 for the fact that I have a routine life and three weeks holiday per year. I suppose you could say I work to live.

I: Miss Burnes, as a school teacher in a working class area of London, how do you feel about Mr. Fisher's attitude towards his work?

B: Personally, I couldn't work to live. I must enjoy whatever I worth doing.

I: In other words, Miss Burnes, work plays one of the most important roles in your life?

B: Definitely! It gives me the mental satisfaction I need and a role in society. Contrary to Mr. Fisher, I can say that I live to work

Part II Self esteem 5

Experiment Report

Project: the development of self-esteem

Subjects: young boys

Procedure:

1. testing (what): measure the boy’s abilities and how they felt about their own abilities

2. dividing (how?) : three groups – those with high self-esteem/ middle self-esteem/ low self-esteem

3. follow-up study (where and when?): in all situations at home/at work/in school/with friends

Conversations: the behavior of the boys

1. boys with high self-esteem: active/ able to express ideas/ successful in school and in relations with other people /creative / led in discussion/ interested in world problem / seldom tired or sick

2. boys with middle self-esteem: like the boys with high self-esteem / express ideas freely/ saw the world as a good and happy place/ not sure of their own value

3. boys with low self-esteem: sad most time/ afraid to start activities/ felt no love/ couldn’t express ideas/ afraid of anger/ no talk in discussion

Findings

1. Three groups of boys act differently

2. High self-esteem does not depend on physical appearance / money/ size of family/ how much the mother at home but it depends on close relationship between the boys and the parents.

Tape-script:

Scientists have learned a great deal about the parts of brain and their functions. They have also studied the development of the personality, for example, how a baby learns to love. In recent studies of two universities in the United States, scientists have investigated the development of self-esteem.

Self-esteem is the respect a person has for himself, his belief in his ability and in the value of what he does. The scientists studied self-esteem in young boys. They gave them many tests. These tests measured the boys' abilities and also how they felt about their own abilities. After the tests, the boys were divided into three groups -- those with high self-esteem, those with middle self-esteem and those with low self-esteem. The scientists continued to study the boys in all situations. They studied them at home, at work, in school, and with their friends.

From their studies, the scientists made some observations. Boys with high self-esteem were active. They were able to express their ideas. They were successful in school and in their relations with other people. In discussions, they led. They didn't just listen. They were interested in world problems. They were creative and believed that they could finish whatever they started. They seldom became tired or sick. In many ways, the boys with middle self-esteem were like the boys with high self-esteem. They too expressed their ideas freely and saw the world as a good and happy place. However, they were not sure of their own value as people. They did their best work when they were sure that other people liked them. The boys with low serf-esteem were different from the other two groups. They were sad most of the time. They were afraid to start activities. They felt that no one loved them. They could not express their ideas. They were afraid of anger. In a discussion, they listened, but they didn't talk.

The scientists asked, "How do some boys develop high self-esteem?" "What is different in their lives?" Some of the answers were surprising. High self-esteem did not depend upon physical appearance, or money, or size of family. It did not depend upon how much the mother was at home. The scientists found that there was a closeness between the boys with high self-esteem and their parents. Their parents showed real interests in them, and spent time with them. They listened to their sons and gave them help when the boys asked for it. They knew their sons' friends. The sons knew that they were important to their parents. These parents demanded good behavior. They made definite rules. They were strict, but not harsh 6. They corrected their sons' behavior by rewards, not by punishment. They never took away their love. On the other hand, the parents of boys with low self-esteem let their sons do almost anything. If a boy made a mistake, the parents punished him harshly 7. The boys believed that their parents didn't love them. There were no definite rules. The family life of the boys with high self-esteem was democratic. The parents made rules, but they led in a kind and thoughtful way. They showed respect for their children's ideas, even when they did not agree with them. They let the boys give their opinions in discussions of family plans. These boys were productive 8 citizens. Now these scientists are studying other groups of children. They want to learn how to help children with low self-esteem feel better about themselves. In this way, these children can become productive citizens too.

Part III Balancing work and family

A. 81% 78% 83% 100%

B.

1. Who is responsible for helping 9 the employees balance work and family?

the employees & the company

2. What policies do some companies have that permit employees spend less time at work and more time at home?

a. working part-time

b. two workers sharing one job

c. setting the hours and days they work

d. working from home by using computers

3. What special skills do Americans develop in balancing work and family?

a. making the best use of personal and family time

b. building trusting relationships at work

c. asking supervisors 10 and family members for help

d. learning to make compromises in their lives

Tapescript:

Many working parents in America find it hard to meet the demands of their jobs and their families. They are faced with difficult choices about how much time to spend at work and at home.

The issue of balancing work and family affects employees at all levels. It especially affects women and single parents. The Family and Work Institute studied the question of who doe~ most of the work in the home when both parents have jobs. It found that working women still do most of the housework. For example, working women do 81 percent of the cooking. They do 78 percent of the cleaning. And women do 87 percent of the buying of food and other products for the home. The situation is even harder for the growing number of single mothers. They often do 100 percent of those jobs at home in addition to their jobs at work.

Then, who is responsible for helping employees balance work and family, the employee or the company? Both are responsible. Every person has to decide what is right for him or her. However, it is the company's responsibility to permit discussion about the issue.

Experts say more companies are trying to help their employees meet the demands of work and family. Some companies have policies that permit employees to spend less time at work and more time at home. These policies include non-traditional work plans. For example, some people work only part-time, which is less than 40 hours a week. Sometimes two workers share one job. Each person works 20 hours a week. Some people are able to set the hours and days they work. For example, they begin work very early in the morning, so they can be home in the afternoon. Or they work 10 hours a day for four days. Then they can spend three days of the week at home. And more and more employees are working from their homes by using computers.

Experts say balancing work and family is forcing Americans to develop special skills. These include making the best use of personal and family time, building trusting relationships at work, and asking supervisors and family members for help. Balancing work and family also means that Americans are learning to make compromises in their lives. They are learning that sometimes it is not possible to do it all or to have it all.

Listen to the following statements. Pay special attention to the parts in bold type. Learn to appreciate and use the language.

1 to raise the root

Remember how angry you got when my ex-girlfriend called the other day? I thought you're gonna raise the roof.

2 to start a business

I am going to start my own business after I graduate.

3 to report(a lost wallet)

I guss I will take it to the police station and see if anyone's repooted a lost wallet.

4 a means to an end

I regard work as a means to an end.

5 to compensate 3 for

I find a comfortable life compensate for the fact that I have a routine life and three weeks holiday per year.

6 to give somebody mental satisfaction

Work gives me the mental satisfaction I need and a role in society.

7 to make(definite/strict/harsh)rules

these parents made definite rules.They werestrict,both not harsh.

8 to correct one's behavior by rewards/punishment

They correcter their son's behavior by rewards,not by punishment.

9 to make compromise

Balancing work and family als means that Americans are learning to make compromise in theur lives.