时间:2018-11-30 作者:英语课 分类:英语标准美文100篇


英语课

Good advice for love's losers


The break-up of a relationship can mean sleepless 1 nights, problems concentrating, loss of appetite, even depression .Every person reacts to the crisis differently. "One can't expect to function normally in the first phase of a separation," says German psychotherapist Doris Wolf, author of a book on how to deal with a break-up." Even if you are someone who has kept your feelings under control you can experience emotions as never before ," says Wolf ,pointing out that men and women generally react differently .Men tend to suppress their pain by working, or with a new relationship ,or alcohol. Women, on the other hand ,sometimes suffer from depression, fear of the future, or guilt 2 feelings. In contrast to men, women, however, often have a good friend who will listen, give comfort or advice. That, says Wolf, is important, because anger, sadness and frustration 3 need to be expressed.


Psychologist Dorothea Boehm, from Munich, Germany, advises people to avoid idealizing the ex-partner." Avoid displaying pictures of yourself and the ex, or of a favorite restaurant you visited together ,or of music that you both enjoyed." she says .Even if you both plan to" stay good friends", it normally doesn't last .That's because one partner might always nurture 4 the hope of restarting the relationship. Boehm says this could stop new experiences, and disappointment will be the outcome .A much more meaningful approach would be to keep a diary with a section on negative things," Writing things down helps put a distance between you and the experience and that is important." says psychologist Gina Kaestele, who holds seminars (研讨会) on getting through the break-up of a relationship. Creating a separation ceremony could also be important, Kaestele says. She adds, however, that each person should find her or his own method. One person might write a letter that is never sent while another might prefer a drawing or mental exercise as a sort of ritual. One way to deal with extreme anger could be to do unusual things like throwing an egg into the bathtub, Kaestele says. Even cleaning up the egg mess afterwards could be helpful because a separation affects both the soul and the body, which is under extreme tension, Wolf explains. This is only reduced by exercise and cleaning is exercise. And nutrition is extremely important during the phase.



1 sleepless
adj.不睡眠的,睡不著的,不休息的
  • The situation gave her many sleepless nights.这种情况害她一连好多天睡不好觉。
  • One evening I heard a tale that rendered me sleepless for nights.一天晚上,我听说了一个传闻,把我搞得一连几夜都不能入睡。
2 guilt
n.犯罪;内疚;过失,罪责
  • She tried to cover up her guilt by lying.她企图用谎言掩饰自己的罪行。
  • Don't lay a guilt trip on your child about schoolwork.别因为功课责备孩子而使他觉得很内疚。
3 frustration
n.挫折,失败,失效,落空
  • He had to fight back tears of frustration.他不得不强忍住失意的泪水。
  • He beat his hands on the steering wheel in frustration.他沮丧地用手打了几下方向盘。
4 nurture
n.养育,照顾,教育;滋养,营养品;vt.养育,给与营养物,教养,扶持
  • The tree grows well in his nurture.在他的培育下这棵树长得很好。
  • The two sisters had received very different nurture.这俩个姊妹接受过极不同的教育。
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