时间:2018-12-08 作者:英语课 分类:背诵为王第一册


英语课

             82                    Three Jokes


 


Joke 1


Clerk in a post office, after weighing the letter: "That letter's too heavy. You'll have to put another stamp on it."Man: "What's the good of that? If I put another stamp on it, that will only make it heavier, won's it?"


Joke 2


"What are you doing, my dear?"said a mother to her four-year-old daughter.  "I'm writing a letter to Helen,"the little girl answered. "But dear,"said the mother, "you don's know how to write."


The little girl continued to make marks on the paper with her pencil and answered: "Well, Helen doesn's know how to read, so it doesn's make any difference."


Joke 3


A school inspector 1 was visiting an English class one day. He found some students were not sure about how to put the letters i or e in the words like receive,"believe,"and ceiling 2."He said: "Students, I can give you a rule. It always works 3 well for me."The students were very interested. Even the teacher seemed eager to learn this important rule.


The inspector continued: "It is simply this: Write the i and the e exactly alike 4 and then put the dot in the middle over them."


 


   inspector  巡视员     receive    收到, 接到 


   believe    相信     ceiling    天花板     dot        , 圆点


                                 笑 话 三 则


笑话1 


邮局的工作人员称过信后:“这封信太重了。你需要再贴一张邮票。”  寄信人:“那样做有什么好处?如果我在信上再贴一张邮票,岂不是更重了?” 


笑话2 


“做什么呢,宝贝?”妈妈问她四岁的女儿。  “我在给海伦写信,”小姑娘回答。  “可是宝贝,”妈妈说,“你不知道怎么写。”  小姑娘继续用铅笔在纸上涂画,答道:“哦,海伦不认识字,所以会写不会写都一样。” 


笑话3 


一天,有个学校巡视员在视察一堂英语课时,发现有些学生拿不准像“receive”、“believe”和“ceiling”这些单词中的字母ie什么在前,什么在后。他说:“同学们,我可以告诉你们一个规律。这个规律对我来说很管用。”学生们很感兴趣,甚至老师也急于想知道这个重要的规律。 


巡视员接着说:“很简单: ie写得很相像,然后在它们上面中间的地方点个点。”


 




1 inspector
n.检查员,监察员,视察员
  • The inspector was interested in everything pertaining to the school.视察员对有关学校的一切都感兴趣。
  • The inspector was shining a flashlight onto the tickets.查票员打着手电筒查看车票。
2 ceiling
n.天花板;(规定价格、工资等的)最高限额
  • It took more or less a whole day to paint the ceiling.粉刷天花板用了将近一整天的时间。
  • A fly is on the ceiling.一只苍蝇在天花板上。
3 works
n.作品,著作;工厂,活动部件,机件
  • We expect writers to produce more and better works.我们期望作家们写出更多更好的作品。
  • The novel is regarded as one of the classic works.这篇小说被公认为是最优秀的作品之一。
4 alike
adj.同样的,相像的;adv.一样地;同程度地 
  • The twins are so alike that I can't tell which is which.这对双胞胎一模一样,我分辨不出谁是谁。
  • All stories seemed dreadfully alike,no matter who told them.看来,不管谁讲,故事都是千篇一律的。
学英语单词
absent respiration
Actaletidae
aggregate cost
allopora scabiosa
AMFID
andrzejs
aqueous alkali
arthroscopist
atmospherization
auto calibration
Ban Khok
bare boat charters on annual contracts
baroviers
bet on it
branching repeater
broken-heartedly
Champawat
co-linearity
compression cyanosis
COP-BLEO
Coptis chinensis Franch.
coral beans
corbiculate
cottrell installation
cross-hole testing
cybrid
cypherpunk
Cómbolo, Mt.
dall's porpoise
damage due to pressing
deformation imaging process
depository receipt
depot control panel
Derveni
desynchroniser corrector
diisopropylgluorophosphate
ebionitisms
electro-hemostasis
electrostatic collector failed element monitor
energy usage
extended graphic character set
Famagusta Dist.
field warehouse receipts
filling line
formation of gas
forthspeaker
galloots
governed speed
guided missile range
hypernymy
hypophoneme
hyposporangium
Ieper(Ypres)
in a puzzle as to
intercoder reliability
interorbital
iodo-isopropyl alcohol
Kiewietskuil
light colonel
lookout on the forecastle
M.S.T.
Manchhar L.
materialled
melting off
metalicity
microcaliper log
motion time standards (mts) system
must-see TV
neurilemoma
non-stereospecificity
nuovissimo
oberon (france)
parahilgardite (hilgardite-3tc)
payload sensor
Polygonum campanulatum
post-Newtonian metric
post-offices
primary distribution system
push bunts
put forward criticism on
radar homing beacon
richetite
roundoff constant
sawtooth wave generator
separant coating
septum mucosa deptessor
set yourself up as sth
smooth section knife
stabilovolt tube
starter shift lever
syndrome of deficiency of heart yin
tachometer head
terminal diagram
time wage
tree ring calendar
two-way ramp
unshapes
vertical branch
winfrith
your-grace
zone of dense welding
zygoblast