迟到的情书(8)

 　　"I do not remember very much more about that day, except that the sun seemed to have stopped shining and the country no longer looked beautiful and full of promise, but bleak 1 and desolate 2 as it sometimes does in winter or in times of drought. Late that afternoon, Jantje, the little Hottentot herd 3 boy, came up to me and handed me a letter , which he said the English baas had left for me. It was the only love letter I ever received, but it turned all my bitterness and grief into a peacefulness which was the nearest I could get, then, to happiness. I knew Richard still loved me, and somehow, as long as I had his letter, I felt that we could never be really parted, even if he were in England and I had to remain on the farm. I have it yet, and though I am an old, tired woman, it still gives me hope and courage."

　　"那天的事我记不大清楚了，只记得当时阳光惨淡，田野也失去了美丽的丰采和欣欣向荣的景象，萧瑟凄凉得跟冬天或大旱时一样。那天傍晚，在我和父亲动身回家之前，霍但托特族的小牧童詹杰交给我一封信，他说是那位英国老爷留给我的。这可是我有生以来收到的唯一的情书！它将我的忧伤一扫而光，使我的心情变得平静--当时对我来说几乎类似幸福的平静。我知道理查德仍在爱着我。不知怎么回事，有了这封信，我便觉得我们不可能真正分开，哪怕他到了英国、我还留在南非的农场。这封信我至今仍保留着，尽管我已经年迈体衰，但它仍能带给我希望和勇气。"

"I must have been a wonderful letter, Aunt Stephia,"I said.
"斯蒂菲娜老姑，那封信一定美极了吧，"我说。

The old lady came back from her dreams of that far-off romance."Perhaps," she said, hesitating a little, "perhaps, my dear, you would care to read it ?"
老太太从她那久远的爱之梦中醒过神来。"也许，"她带着犹豫的神情说，"也许，亲爱的，你想看看那封信吧？"

"I should love to , Aunt Stephia,"I said gently.
"我很想看，斯蒂菲娜老姑，"我轻声说。

She rose at once and tripped into the house as eagerly as a young girl. When she came back she handed me a letter, faded and yellow with age, the edges of the envelope worn and frayed 4 as though it had been much handled. But when I came to open it I found that the seal was unbroken.
她猛地站起身，奔进屋里，急切得像个小姑娘。她从屋里出来后，递给我一封信。由于天长日久，那信已经褪色发黄，信封边已经磨损，好像曾被摩挲过好多次。但在取信时，我发现封口还没有拆开。

"Open it ,open it,"said Great-aunt Stephia, and her voice was shaking.
"拆开，拆开吧！"斯蒂菲娜老姑声音颤抖地说。

I broke the seal and read.
我撕开封口，开始念信。

It was not a love letter in the true sense of the word, but pages of the minutest directions of how"my sweetest Phina"was to elude 5 her father's vigilance, creep down to the drift at night and there meet Jantje with a horse which would take her to Smitsdorp. There she was to go to "my true friend, Henry Wilson",who would give her money and make arrangements for her to follow her lover to Cape 6 Town and from there to England ," where, my love, we can he be married at once. But if, my dearest, you are not sure that you can face lift with me in a land strange to you, then do not take this important step, for I love you too much to wish you the smallest unhappiness. If you do not come, and if I do not hear from you, then I shall know that you could never be happy so far from the people and the country which you love. If, however, you feel you can keep your promise to me, but are of too timid and modest a journey to England unaccompanied, then write to me, and I will, by some means, return to fetch my bride."

　　严格说来，它算不上是一封情书，实际是只是几页内容详尽的行动指南。信里称"我最亲爱的菲娜"该怎么摆脱她父亲的监视，夜里逃出家门，詹杰会在浅滩上牵马等着她，然后将她驮到史密斯多普，到了那里再去找理查德的"知心朋友亨利·威尔逊"，他会给她钱为她作好安排，使她能跟随她的情人到开普敦，随后转道英国。"亲爱的，这样我们就可以在英国结婚了。但是我的至爱，如果你不能保证你能在一个陌生的地方和我一块生活，你就不必采取这个重大行动，因为我太爱你了，不能让你感到丝毫不快。如果你不来，如果我听不到你的回信，我就会知道，如果你离开你挚爱的亲人和乡土，你是不会幸福的。但如果你能实践你对我的许诺而由于你生性持重胆怯不愿单身前往英国，就来信告诉我，那我就会设法回南非来迎接我的新娘。"

I read no further.
我没有再念下去。

"But Aunt Phina!"I gasped 7. "Why…why…?"
"可是，菲娜老姑，"我气喘吁吁地说，"为什么……？为什么……"

　　The old lady was watching me with trembling eagerness, her face flushed and her eyes bright with expectation."Read it aloud, my dear,"she said."I want to hear every word of it. There was never anyone I could trust…Uitlanders were hated in my young days…I could not ask anyone."

　　老太太的身子由于渴望知道信的内容而颤抖，她的眼睛炯炯有神地凝视着我，脸庞因急切的期待一片绯红。"亲爱的，大声念吧！"她说，"信里的一字一句，我都要听！当时我找不到可靠的人给我念……我年轻时，'洋人'是被人深恶痛绝的……我找不到人给我念啊！"

"But, Auntie, don't you even know what he wrote?"
"可是老姑，难道你一直不知道信里的事吗？"

The old lady looked down, troubled and shy like a child who has unwittingly done wrong.
老太太低头俯视着，像一个无心做错事的孩子一样怯生生的，不知说什么才好。

"No, dear," she said, speaking very low."You see, I never learned to read.
"不知道，亲爱的，"她用低沉的声调说，“你知道，我从来没有念过书啊！”