时间:2019-01-03 作者:英语课 分类:趣味英语


英语课

                                                                    一


有一对外国老夫妇到内蒙古农村住了下来。因为村里的人无法和他们交流,老夫妇很寂寞,就养了一只猫。一天早上 ,老夫妇正梳理猫毛,一个人从旁边过来,冲着俩人说“鼓捣猫呢”。夫妇俩随即冲着来人说:“Good morning .”傍晚时分,二人正在把晾在外边的衣服收起来,路过的一个村民冲着他们说:“鼓捣衣服呢!”二人这回反应很快说:“Good evening.”私下里老夫妇俩感叹,合着他们这里的人都会说英语呀!


                                                                    二

小明上英文课时跟老师说:May I go to the toilet?
老师说:Go ahead.
小明就坐了下来。过了一会儿,小明又跟老师说:May I go to the toilet?
老师说:Go ahead.
小明又坐了下来。他旁边的同学于是忍不住问:你不是跟老师说要上厕所吗?怎么不
去?
小明说:你没听老师说「去你个头」啊!


                                                                    三

一对热恋中的男女。女生非常没有安全感,于是对着男友说:“SAY ‘I LOVE YOU!! ’SAY IT! SAY IT! SAY IT!”
男的答道:“IT!”
                                                                    四 

一位在美的留学生,想要考国际驾照。在考试时因为过于紧张,看到地上标线是向左转。
他不放心的问道:turn left?
监考官回答: right. 于是他立刻向右转……

                                                                    五 


一天,我准备坐车去学校,正在路上走着,一辆车快速从我面前穿过,并且撞到一位正在观光的日本人。当然情况很是吓人,路边的好心 人立刻冲上前去问道:“How areyou?”日本人上气不接下气的回答:“F..ine,th..ank you...and you?”围观的人顿时愣住。。。由此可知日本人的英文是死记硬背的! 

                                                                    六 

中国建设银行——CBC (Construction Bank of China) ——“存不存?”
中国银行  ——BC (Bank of China)——“不存。”
中国农业银行——ABC (Agriculture Bank of China)— —“啊,不存”
中国工商银行——ICBC (Industry and Commercial Ba nk of China)——“爱存不存”
招商银行  ——CMBC——“存吗??白痴!”
兴业银行  ——CIB——“存一百”
北京市商业银行——BCCB (Beijing City Commercial B ank)——白存存不?”
汇丰银行  ——(HSBC)还是不存”



标签: 趣味英语搞笑
学英语单词
A Special
Abacopteris
adaptive grid generation
Allagadda
antiglaucoma
apotematic
automatic car stop
auxiliary exciting winding
barrister
basilar groove of occipital bone
bee wax
blood-bouillon
c-hs
capacitance drainage
cathkinite
church text
comitantes
CPT-cAMP
debt collection
Delphinium taipaicum
dulcify
effective dispersion coefficient
electrical systematic drawing
evey
excepter
execution of decree
focus magnet
fornix cerebri
free larval development
Galeopsis bifida
genus oedogoniums
God the Holy Spirit
gracing
have the grace to do something
Haversian canals
heat - resistant paint
honey bell
internal external upset drill pipe
international wrongful act
iterative formula
jacket-cooling system
labraria
lambo lambo
ledrite
lens matrix
limpwort
liquefied methane gas tanker
long type
low prf
lustless
maximum-modulus theorem
mid-channel bar
Molasses Water
multiple program loading
nerdy
night-fightings
non-printable
north-light roof
nozzle stand pipe
nuclear nuisance
on the rocks
operational issue
organo-chromate pigment
ospir
phase-contrast
pheromonetreated plot
poster color
praecoxin
preceedings
prohibited value
quercus infectoria olivie
quick lock
re-teach
retained object
rondure
roxifiban
run hot
rusbanks
shaft whirl
shared channel
ship's alternation
solids level
spiral seam tube
stubble-grown
switchable capacitor
tetralone
Tetrastigma apiculatum
Tezpur
thigh-slappers
tilem
triumphalistically
tuck-ins
Tucuparé
two-humped
ultra large crude carrier
underconsumption of capital
unsteady constraint
US Cabinet
visiometer
wastepapers
weight landed
Windhoek