如何做到工作与生活的完美平衡

 工作与生活的平衡因其重要性而决不能置之他人之手，比如你的雇主。在悉尼的TED大会上，马什勾勒出一幅美好图景：完美的一天建立在与家人相处，个人发展以及工作三者之间的平衡之上；进而他鼓励人们让这一理想变为现实。短短10分钟的演说，风趣幽默毫无冷场，直接有力的指出生活与工作如何取得平衡，这是政府与企业都不会说的秘密，我们无法再寻求外援，是每个人责无旁贷的问题。如果你自己不去面对，就会有人替你掌控...你不只要努力工作，出了工作之外你还有更多更重要的责任必须去面对，请问，你的生活失去平衡了吗？

TED的主讲者是畅销作家Nigel Marsh 1，在成为畅销作家之前，有一份在广告公司令人钦羡的优渥工作，生活精彩极了。如同他所说的，他有本事把蜡烛两头烧一烧就变成精致艺术品，每个晚上都像是小周末，音乐会，即兴喜剧，泡夜店或单纯喝酒都是周一到周五的例行节目...
这样精彩的生活，让工作主宰了他的人生，Nigel成了他曾发誓不要成为的那种人 - 。为工作而活的奴隶，而非为了生活而工作正因为他发现自己的生活中只剩下工作，连睡觉都梦到工作，脾气也越来越暴躁，不论老婆孩子多么体贴，他都能不假思索地对他们大吼大叫...Nigel Marsh是小说《Fat, Forty and Fired》的作者，一听这个书名就很有趣是不是。
Nigel Marsh: How to make work-life balance work英语演讲：
What I thought I would do is I would start with a simple request. I'd like all of you to pause for a moment, you wretched weaklings, and take stock of your miserable 2 existence. (Laughter)
Now that was the advice that St. Benedict gave his rather startled followers 3 in the fifth century. It was the advice that I decided 4 to follow myself when I turned 40. Up until that moment, I had been that classic corporate 5 warrior 6 -- I was eating too much, I was drinking too much, I was working too hard and I was neglecting the family. And I decided that I would try and turn my life around. In particular, I decided I would try to address the thorny 7 issue of work-life balance. So I stepped back from the workforce 8, and I spent a year at home with my wife and four young children. But all I learned about work-life balance from that year was that I found it quite easy to balance work and life when I didn't have any work. (Laughter) Not a very useful skill, especially when the money runs out.
So I went back to work, and I've spent these seven years since struggling with, studying and writing about work-life balance. And I have four observations I'd like to share with you today. The first is: if society's to make any progress on this issue, we need an honest debate. But the trouble is so many people talk so much rubbish about work-life balance. All the discussions about flexi-time or dress-down Fridays or paternity leave only serve to mask the core issue, which is that certain job and career choices are fundamentally incompatible 9 with being meaningfully engaged on a day-to-day basis with a young family. Now the first step in solving any problem is acknowledging the reality of the situation you're in. And the reality of the society that we're in is there are thousands and thousands of people out there leading lives of quiet, screaming desperation, where they work long, hard hours at jobs they hate to enable them to buy things they don't need to impress people they don't like. (Laughter) (Applause) It's my contention 10 that going to work on Friday in jeans and [a] T-shirt isn't really getting to the nub of the issue.
(Laughter)
The second observation I'd like to make is we need to face the truth that governments and corporations aren't going to solve this issue for us. We should stop looking outside. It's up to us as individuals to take control and responsibility for the type of lives that we want to lead. If you don't design your life, someone else will design it for you, and you may just not like their idea of balance. It's particularly important -- this isn't on the World Wide Web, is it? I'm about to get fired -- it's particularly important that you never put the quality of your life in the hands of a commercial corporation. Now I'm not talking here just about the bad companies -- the "abattoirs 11 of the human soul," as I call them. (Laughter) I'm talking about all companies. Because commercial companies are inherently designed to get as much out of you [as] they can get away with. It's in their nature; it's in their DNA 12; it's what they do -- even the good, well-intentioned companies. On the one hand, putting childcare facilities in the workplace is wonderful and enlightened. On the other hand, it's a nightmare -- it just means you spend more time at the bloody 13 office. We have to be responsible for setting and enforcing the boundaries that we want in our life.
The third observation is we have to be careful with the time frame that we choose upon which to judge our balance. Before I went back to work after my year at home, I sat down and I wrote out a detailed 14, step-by-step description of the ideal balanced day that I aspired 15 to. And it went like this: wake up well rested after a good night's sleep. Have sex. Walk the dog. Have breakfast with my wife and children. Have sex again. (Laughter) Drive the kids to school on the way to the office. Do three hours' work. Play a sport with a friend at lunchtime. Do another three hours' work. Meet some mates in the pub for an early evening drink. Drive home for dinner with my wife and kids. Meditate 16 for half an hour. Have sex. Walk the dog. Have sex again. Go to bed. (Applause) How often do you think I have that day? (Laughter) We need to be realistic. You can't do it all in one day. We need to elongate 17 the time frame upon which we judge the balance in our life, but we need to elongate it without falling into the trap of the "I'll have a life when I retire, when my kids have left home, when my wife has divorced me, my health is failing, I've got no mates or interests left." (Laughter) A day is too short; "after I retire" is too long. There's got to be a middle way.
A fourth observation: We need to approach balance in a balanced way. A friend came to see me last year -- and she doesn't mind me telling this story -- a friend came to see me last year and said, "Nigel, I've read your book. And I realize that my life is completely out of balance. It's totally dominated by work. I work 10 hours a day; I commute 18 two hours a day. All of my relationships have failed. There's nothing in my life apart from my work. So I've decided to get a grip and sort it out. So I joined a gym." (Laughter) Now I don't mean to mock, but being a fit 10-hour-a-day office rat isn't more balanced; it's more fit. (Laughter) Lovely though physical exercise may be, there are other parts to life -- there's the intellectual side; there's the emotional side; there's the spiritual side. And to be balanced, I believe we have to attend to all of those areas -- not just do 50 stomach crunches 19.
Now that can be daunting 20. Because people say, "Bloody hell mate, I haven't got time to get fit. You want me to go to church and call my mother." And I understand. I truly understand how that can be daunting. But an incident that happened a couple of years ago gave me a new perspective. My wife, who is somewhere in the audience today, called me up at the office and said, "Nigel, you need to pick our youngest son" -- Harry 21 -- "up from school." Because she had to be somewhere else with the other three children for that evening. So I left work an hour early that afternoon and picked Harry up at the school gates. We walked down to the local park, messed around on the swings, played some silly games. I then walked him up the hill to the local cafe, and we shared a pizza for two, then walked down the hill to our home, and I gave him his bath and put him in his Batman pajamas 22. I then read him a chapter of Roald Dahl's "James and the Giant Peach." I then put him to bed, tucked him in, gave him a kiss on his forehead and said, "Goodnight, mate," and walked out of his bedroom. As I was walking out of his bedroom, he said, "Dad?" I went, "Yes, mate?" He went, "Dad, this has been the best day of my life, ever." I hadn't done anything, hadn't taken him to Disney World or bought him a Playstation.
Now my point is the small things matter. Being more balanced doesn't mean dramatic upheaval 23 in your life. With the smallest investment in the right places, you can radically 24 transform the quality of your relationships and the quality of your life. Moreover, I think, it can transform society. Because if enough people do it, we can change society's definition of success away from the moronically 25 simplistic notion that the person with the most money when he dies wins, to a more thoughtful and balanced definition of what a life well lived looks like. And that, I think, is an idea worth spreading.
(Applause)




点击收听单词发音  






1
marsh

  
 


n.沼泽，湿地


参考例句：





There are a lot of frogs in the marsh.沼泽里有许多青蛙。
I made my way slowly out of the marsh.我缓慢地走出这片沼泽地。












2
miserable

  
 


adj.悲惨的，痛苦的；可怜的，糟糕的


参考例句：





It was miserable of you to make fun of him.你取笑他，这是可耻的。
Her past life was miserable.她过去的生活很苦。












3
followers

  
 


追随者( follower的名词复数 )； 用户； 契据的附面； 从动件


参考例句：





the followers of Mahatma Gandhi 圣雄甘地的拥护者
The reformer soon gathered a band of followers round him. 改革者很快就获得一群追随者支持他。












4
decided

  
 


adj.决定了的，坚决的；明显的，明确的


参考例句：





This gave them a decided advantage over their opponents.这使他们比对手具有明显的优势。
There is a decided difference between British and Chinese way of greeting.英国人和中国人打招呼的方式有很明显的区别。












5
corporate

  
 


adj.共同的，全体的；公司的，企业的


参考例句：





This is our corporate responsibility.这是我们共同的责任。
His corporate's life will be as short as a rabbit's tail.他的公司的寿命是兔子尾巴长不了。












6
warrior

  
 


n.勇士，武士，斗士


参考例句：





The young man is a bold warrior.这个年轻人是个很英勇的武士。
A true warrior values glory and honor above life.一个真正的勇士珍视荣誉胜过生命。












7
thorny

  
 


adj.多刺的，棘手的


参考例句：





The young captain is pondering over a thorny problem.年轻的上尉正在思考一个棘手的问题。
The boys argued over the thorny points in the lesson.孩子们辩论功课中的难点。












8
workforce

  
 


n.劳动大军，劳动力


参考例句：





A large part of the workforce is employed in agriculture.劳动人口中一大部分受雇于农业。
A quarter of the local workforce is unemployed.本地劳动力中有四分之一失业。












9
incompatible

  
 


adj.不相容的，不协调的，不相配的


参考例句：





His plan is incompatible with my intent.他的计划与我的意图不相符。
Speed and safety are not necessarily incompatible.速度和安全未必不相容。












10
contention

  
 


n.争论，争辩，论战；论点，主张


参考例句：





The pay increase is the key point of contention. 加薪是争论的焦点。
The real bone of contention,as you know,is money.你知道，争论的真正焦点是钱的问题。












11
abattoirs

  
 


n.屠场( abattoir的名词复数 )；（拳击、摔跤、斗牛等的）角斗场


参考例句：





All that talk about abattoirs turned me right off! 关于屠宰场的那些话让我十分恶心。 来自互联网
They take more care and have a greater number of staff than more intensive abattoirs. 他们更注意生产，比那些更密集的屠宰场拥有更多的雇员。 来自互联网












12
DNA

  
 


(缩)deoxyribonucleic acid 脱氧核糖核酸


参考例句：





DNA is stored in the nucleus of a cell.脱氧核糖核酸储存于细胞的细胞核里。
Gene mutations are alterations in the DNA code.基因突变是指DNA密码的改变。












13
bloody

  
 


adj.非常的的；流血的；残忍的；adv.很；vt.血染


参考例句：





He got a bloody nose in the fight.他在打斗中被打得鼻子流血。
He is a bloody fool.他是一个十足的笨蛋。












14
detailed

  
 


adj.详细的，详尽的，极注意细节的，完全的


参考例句：





He had made a detailed study of the terrain.他对地形作了缜密的研究。
A detailed list of our publications is available on request.我们的出版物有一份详细的目录备索。












15
aspired

  
 


v.渴望，追求( aspire的过去式和过去分词 )


参考例句：





She aspired to a scientific career. 她有志于科学事业。
Britain,France,the United States and Japan all aspired to hegemony after the end of World War I. 第一次世界大战后，英、法、美、日都想争夺霸权。 来自《简明英汉词典》












16
meditate

  
 


v.想，考虑，（尤指宗教上的）沉思，冥想


参考例句：





It is important to meditate on the meaning of life.思考人生的意义很重要。
I was meditating,and reached a higher state of consciousness.我在冥想，并进入了一个更高的意识境界。












17
elongate

  
 


v.拉长，伸长，延长


参考例句：





We plan to elongate the cooperation with that company in Australia.我们打算延长与澳洲那家公司的合作关系。
Corn is treated when the stalk starts to elongate.在玉米秆开始拔节时，给玉米打药。












18
commute

  
 


vi.乘车上下班；vt.减(刑)；折合；n.上下班交通


参考例句：





I spend much less time on my commute to work now.我现在工作的往返时间要节省好多。
Most office workers commute from the suburbs.很多公司的职员都是从郊外来上班的。












19
crunches

  
 


n.（突发的）不足( crunch的名词复数 )；需要做出重要决策的困难时刻；紧要关头；嘎吱的响声v.嘎吱嘎吱地咬嚼( crunch的第三人称单数 )；嘎吱作响；（快速大量地）处理信息；数字捣弄


参考例句：





I can't bear the way she crunches the sugar. 我简直看不惯她嚼糖的那副样子。 来自辞典例句
Crunches with a twisting motion (to hit obliques) are excellent. 做仰卧起坐时加上转体动作更好。 来自互联网












20
daunting

  
 


adj.使人畏缩的


参考例句：





They were faced with the daunting task of restoring the house.他们面临着修复房子的艰巨任务。
Starting a new job can be a daunting prospect.开始一项新工作有时会让人望而却步。












21
harry

  
 


vt.掠夺，蹂躏，使苦恼


参考例句：





Today,people feel more hurried and harried.今天，人们感到更加忙碌和苦恼。
Obama harried business by Healthcare Reform plan.奥巴马用医改掠夺了商界。












22
pajamas

  
 


n.睡衣裤


参考例句：





At bedtime,I take off my clothes and put on my pajamas.睡觉时，我脱去衣服，换上睡衣。
He was wearing striped pajamas.他穿着带条纹的睡衣裤。












23
upheaval

  
 


n.胀起，(地壳)的隆起；剧变，动乱


参考例句：





It was faced with the greatest social upheaval since World War Ⅱ.它面临第二次世界大战以来最大的社会动乱。
The country has been thrown into an upheaval.这个国家已经陷入动乱之中。












24
radically

  
 


ad.根本地，本质地


参考例句：





I think we may have to rethink our policies fairly radically. 我认为我们可能要对我们的政策进行根本的反思。
The health service must be radically reformed. 公共医疗卫生服务必须进行彻底改革。












25
moronically

  
 


鲁钝


参考例句：